


Hoping For Better Dayz - Archived!

by SaikouManiac



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Violence, Cheating, Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Love Confessions, Love Triangles, Masturbation, Masturbation Interruptus, Oh god is this becoming a slow burn?, Oral Sex, Original Character Death(s), Personal loss, Praise Kink, Recreational Drug Use, References to Depression, References to Drugs, Romantic Fluff, Rough Sex, Sex, Slow Burn, Vaginal Sex, Violence, War, fUCK ME, mentions to PTSD
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-23
Updated: 2017-11-22
Packaged: 2018-11-03 21:39:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 29,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10975854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaikouManiac/pseuds/SaikouManiac
Summary: Hey, I'm archiving this version and starting over. This story will have sort of the same premise but rewritten and restructured. Please stick around for the new version!========================================"Do you know what I miss most about her? I miss her smile, and how she seemed to know how to make everything better."2D laced his fingers between hers. "That's what I miss most about you."**Post-The Fall, pre-Humanz.Spotify playlist now available! (https://open.spotify.com/user/saikoumaniac/playlist/78j3b4JbSmFKSaGrLvexop)





	1. Hoping To Go Home

               Thunder cracked overhead, threatening a heavy storm. 2D looked up drearily before turning back to the campfire to prod the burning logs with a stick. The two others huddled around the fire looked just as miserable as he felt, one of them pulling his knees to his chest, as if to protect himself from the thunder. Another walked by, patting him on the shoulder in silent greeting as she passed on her way to her tent. As he stared into the calm flames, 2D contemplated how he even got to be here, in some war-torn country, surrounded by folks of all walks of life, just as wary and tired of the situation as him.

               Three hundred twenty days ago, Stuart Pot was drafted into the British Army, shipped off to some country, whose name he'd long forgotten, and left to march along the countryside with a ragtag platoon. 2D was one of three medical staff assigned to look after the well-being of his fellow soldiers. So far, he'd done nothing more than wash and clean scraped knees and elbows, and doled out moist towels to overheated soldiers as they had yet to encounter battle. At least this way, he was able to meet the troops. He always enjoyed meeting people.

               2D missed his bandmates, Murdoc, even, just a bit. He missed having a warm bed to sleep in at night, he missed not fearing constantly for his life, he missed eating junk food, and all the luxuries and freedoms that came along with living as a civilian. Most of all, he missed making music, missed collaborating with other artists and being creative in his element. Granted, there was a pair of women in the platoon who sang occasionally to help boost morale, but he always just enjoyed listening to them in their groove.

               Lightning flashed, followed shortly after by a clap of thunder. 2D threw the twig into the embers and got up, brushing off his pants. He wished the others a good night and headed to his tent. He undressed, throwing his fatigues over his heavy boots and pulled the covers over his head for an uneasy night of sparse sleep.

               In the morning, 2D woke up in a puddle. It had rained in the night, and his flimsy tent did little to keep the water out. After breakfast, he mimicked the others, breaking down his tent and put things into his pack; the Lieutenant wanted to move out. Every three days, they moved camp. There was talk that they were just marching with no mission, like the higher-ups had no real plan for their unit. Many of the soldiers hoped that this could mean the end of the war soon, others were pessimistic, saying they could be marching this long way to their death. 2D wanted to believe the former; he just wanted to go home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while since I've written again, but I've finally found the inspiration to do it. I hope you'll stick around to the end, and I hope you'll enjoy my work.


	2. Hoping For Sisters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're just gonna dive right into it!

               They journeyed all day to get to their next camp destination and it was hell. The weather was hot, humid, and muggy; the type of air that was still and hard to breathe in. At night, 2D sat by himself, eating the gruel they were rationed. The novelty of his fame wore off very quickly, shortly after they all witnessed a mortar bombing in a city a few miles away, too far to go help, but close enough to practically smell the pungent odor of burning flesh. After that, things got very serious and the reality of wartime settled on them all. 2D remembered crying in bed that night and tried not to think about it often, as he was still very emotional about it. Someone sitting down next to him pulled him out of his reverie.

               Amelie was a quiet woman. She made eye contact with him when he snapped out of his thoughts and flashed him a quick smile before she looked down and dug into her bowl of food. Her sister, Adeline, joined them on his other side shortly after. Both women had dark hair and solemn, deep eyes, the colour of rich soil. Neither of them looked like they belonged in soldier's fatigues.

               "How are you tonight, 2D?" Adeline asked, shyly. Hers and her sister's accents were most definitely Londoner, with a touch of French to some words, though neither she nor her sister had any Caucasian features. Through the many days with them, he learned that their parents, both French citizens, moved to London for job relocations. Shortly after, they birthed Adeline, and Amelie followed four years later.

               "'M alrigh'. Tired, honestly," 2D spoke around a mouth full of slop, a bit spraying out. Amelie laughed quietly behind her spoon and 2D felt his face warm. "How 'bout you two?"

               "Ready for sleep, though we've yet to set up our tent." Adeline pushed the mush around in her bowl before asking in that airy way of hers, "Have you already set up camp?"

               "'Course. Right over there, under the trees."

               "Oh!" Adeline perked up. "That's a good spot; maybe we can set up next to you." Her face flushed when 2D nodded, though only her sister noticed. "Amelie, if you're done eating, could you...?"

               Amelie ran a thin hand through her cropped hair. "Fine, but you're cleaning my bowl." She stood and left, barely giving 2D any time to call out a rushed "S-See you later..." She gave him a brief wave in response, not bothering to look over her shoulder.

               After Amelie left, silence fell between 2D and Adeline as they finished their dinner. He could tell she was struggling to find a topic to talk about so he decided to help. "S-So did Amelie cut her hair again?"

               Adeline swallowed quickly, eager to talk to him. "Yes, a few days ago I think. It looks terrible! She cut it with her hatchet!" 2D chuckled, muttering about how he thought it looked nice. "You know, I can't wait for this damn war to be over. We'll go home and have hair care products and regular showers and maybe she'll let it grow again. She has the loveliest hair, 2D, you should see it." She ran her fingers through her own hair, shoulder length and cut sharp, daydreaming of a luxurious bathroom. If Amelie hadn't cut hers so short, they might have looked like twins.

               "I can clean your bowl, if you're done." 2D's voice startled Adeline. He was looking at her, hand out. Shyly, she conceded, giving him her bowl, and he reached over to her feet, grabbing Amelie's as well, stacking all three and meandering off.

               Later, when he went to his tent, Amelie was there, hers and her sister's joint tent neighboring his. She was laying out under the darkened sky, leaning back on her elbows with a battered cigarette smoking between her lips, eyes blank.

               "Wow, a cigarette?" 2D quietly whistled, sitting down next to her. Cigarettes were a rarity during war, he'd figured out. The singer smoked his last one a week and a half ago, and he sorely missed it. She offered him a drag and he hesitantly asked, "You sure?"

               "Yeah. You'd be helping me quit." As she spoke, smoke curled out of her mouth. "I never used to smoke so much until I was drafted. My sister hates it, so I guess the less for me the better."

               2D took it and stared at it for a moment. He was acutely aware that Amelie's lips were just there moments before. Finally, he brought it to his own mouth and took the longest drag he could manage. It was immensely satisfying. They shared the cigarette until it could no longer be smoked and Amelie smothered it into the ground. Adeline came and plopped down next to her sister not long after that and the three of them chatted quietly into the night for a while.

               "I'm off to bed," Amelie yawned wearily. "G'night, you two." She ruffled both 2D's and Adeline's hair as she stood to duck into the tent, giving a meaningful look at her sister, who grimaced back.

               Adeline patted down her hair, looking over at 2D, who was running his fingers through his own mop, smiling. "Quiet tonight, hm?"

               "It's quite nice. Should be able to get some sleep tonight, I hope."

               "Yes, if the bugs and the heat don't get to us first!" Adeline could feel her stomach clenching in embarrassment.

               "Fingers crossed it dunnit rain again. Almost drowned in my own bed this morning," 2D chuckled. Adeline laughed along nervously. Their mirth didn't last but a second though, and 2D felt the exhaustion of the long trip really weigh on him. After a bit, he stretched and stood up. "Fink I'll hit the hay too. You?" He offered a helping hand to Adeline, who stuttered before gently taking his gesture, mumbling incoherently, her face turning pink.

               "G'night then. Sleep tight!" He turned promptly on his heel and into his own tent, zipping it up behind him. As he finally got comfortable in his bed roll, he could hear frantic whispers in the tent next to his, though he couldn't quite make out what was being said, as his eyes were already weighing shut.


	3. Hoping For a Kiss

               Three more weeks passed with nothing happening. Not even the scouting team, who ventured out further and further every day, saw anything. The Lieutenant was meeting with her officers less and less lately. The troops took this as a good sign. “Hold out, until the end. Then you’ll see, we’ll get to go home,” they all murmured, hopeful. 2D supposed it was good that they had something to hold on to. He didn’t really believe it, but he wanted to, wanted to believe they'd get to return home soon.

               Then there was another shelling. Their unit wasn’t close enough to see the buildings crumble this time, though they saw the planes flying overhead, and saw the black smoke curling up in the distance. Silence fell over the camp, and 2D could swear he could hear the crying and the screaming of people burning alive, trying to escape collapsing houses, calling for help. 2D clamped his hands over his ears and squeezed his eyes shut, hoping to drown it out and stop the tears from flowing.

               The scouting team came back. They were bloodied and bruised. As soon as they saw the bombs drop, their commanding officer led them on a rescue mission into the town, to help anyone they could. One of the worst injuries was the scout who suffered a broken leg. He was limping back into camp by Adeline’s and Amelie’s support, arms slung over their shoulders, gripping their battledress with bloody hands.

               Adeline’s face was covered in blood on one side and her jacket’s sleeve was ripped almost cleanly from the rest of it. Amelie was covered in smoke and ash, hands dark from soot, hair smoking on one side from being singed in a fire and a red lump forming on her forehead just above her brow. None of the scouts made it out unharmed. The medical tent was busy that night.

               Screaming and pained moans filled the camp. The soldier with the broken leg had it set and given pain killers to ease his suffering. He fell asleep quickly in the bed in the corner. He and Adeline had the worst injuries. She was crying as the senior medical officer and the other medical guy (2D kept forgetting his name) sewed up her forehead, brow still caked in blood. The other five, including Amelie, were being treated for burns and smoke inhalation by 2D. Amelie insisted he treat the others first, as she wanted to sit with her sister as she got sewed up, but when Adeline squeezed her supporting hand in pain, she buckled. It was discovered her palms and fingers were tender with burns.

               Amelie finally surrendered to 2D demanding she sit at his gurney to be treated. He had her stick her hands into a tub of cool water as he treated the red bump on her forehead. A dark bruise was quickly blooming there.

               “Wha’ happened here?” He asked as he touched it gingerly, fingers trailing into her burnt hair above it. Amelie hissed, swatting his hand away as he put slight pressure on the bump, curious.

               “Something exploded and blew chunks. I guess whatever it was, was on fire because, well,” she gestured as best she could to her hair as 2D dried her hands and applied a cooling salve to her burns.

               He rubbed his thumbs over her red palms slowly. Rubbing in the ointment, you know. “Does it… hurt? Very much, I mean,” he asked, gulping.

               She shrugged, “Not very much; just very hot and tender.” She gripped his hands and he looked up at her. “I bet I’ll be alright though, thanks to you, _Dr. Pot_.” She laughed at her jibe and hopped off the table, walking over to Adeline, who was having her head wrapped.

               2D felt his face getting warm. Amelie was the only one who called him by his birth name, and he wasn’t sure how to feel about it. Pushing the thought away, he cleared his table in hopes to think of something else.

               In the morning, even before breakfast, the scout team returned. Adeline had her bandages changed, as she had bled through the first ones overnight, and those with burns needed a reapplication of the salve. Soon after, they left on another mission; whatever they were looking for, they were going out more and more as time passed by and nerves ran on edge. Adeline and the broken-leg man stayed behind.

               Adeline was anxious; worried about Amelie, fearful that something like the rescue mission would happen again. Soon her imagination got the best of her and she was worrying herself over an ambush scenario that was unlikely to happen. 2D decided to spend the day with her to help calm her nerves. 

              They played chess as best they could since the set they had was missing a few pieces. Finally, 2D met someone who he could completely destroy in the game. He was a sore winner and enjoyed rubbing his victories in Adeline's face. When they got bored of that, they sat and swapped stories with some of the other soldiers. Most of them talked about family members they wanted to get back to, others told stories about how wonderful or goofy their significant other was. 2D felt it was rather sweet to hear all these experiences. They asked him about his life as a successful musician, how he came up with his songs, and about his bandmates. There were a lot of uncomfortable questions about Murdoc from some of the women, and one man. After getting away from the others, 2D and Adeline sat a little ways away from the camp, playing on the roughed up guitar she carried around. As they jammed together, 2D wondered when he'd get to hear Adeline and her sister sing again.

               Late in the day, they found themselves by the stream near the camp. They removed their boots and stuck their feet into the cool water. The two sat for a while, talking of meaningless things, getting to know each other. He found he had a knack for making her laugh. 2D talked to her about some song ideas he had, hummed some melodies he’d been thinking of, and asked if he could borrow her guitar some time. She agreed on the condition that she could sit in on whatever he was going to do. Adeline talked about how she missed singing in the square of her town, and going to Amelie’s dance recitals and competitions. She shyly talked about how it was a dream of hers to make it big and do what he did; sing and make music, her passion, as a career. When 2D asked her more about it, Adeline quickly dismissed it, face pink, and said she still needed much more practice, though from all the times he’s heard her sing, it was quite lovely.

               2D glanced over at Adeline who was kicking her feet in the shallow water. She was very pretty. Large, almond eyes stared up at the empty, hot sky from a well-defined face with high cheekbones and a happy mouth. Her milky skin had browned considerably under the many days of the hot summer sun. It was amazing how neither Adeline nor her sister got sunburned, while he was quite the opposite. She had a unique look about her, one he'd probably never seen, or at least, didn't recognize until now, and he realized that she and Amelie could be twins at first glance. How lucky of him to get to experience such an incomparable look, twice at once, 2D thought.

               Adeline pushed her hair behind her ear, and 2D noticed that her bandage was coming loose. He reached out to adjust it and found that she was staring at him soulfully as he did so. Her eyes darted down to his lips, and then back to his dark eyes. “2D,” she said quietly. He said nothing, waiting for the rest of her sentence, but it never came. Adeline began to lean in, her lids heavy in a sultry kind of way. 2D felt her breath on his lips. She was so very close, and his heart was beating a mile a minute, rushing hot blood to his cheeks.

               “Addy!” Footsteps crunched gravel and grass quickly, following the call and Amelie happened on the scene. Adeline jerked backwards as both she and 2D looked up to see her sister standing there. “Oh,” she said, backing away. “Sorry. I’m not here.”

               Adeline jumped up and rushed her sister, pulling her into a bear hug and going on about how worried she was. 2D took this moment to collect and calm himself. He was sure his face was as red as the sun. After a few moments, he, too, got up to welcome Amelie back from her mission. She smirked at him, glancing between 2D and her sister, as he talked. “S-So how are your burns? And the bump on your head?” He twisted his hands together, unsure of what to do with them.

               “Better,” she replied, the smirk still on her face. “Listen, should I…?” She gestured a thumb over her shoulder, her brows raised at the two.

               “No!” 2D blurted out. “I… We weren’t doin’ nothin’.” She merely laughed in that skeptical way she did at him. 2D was used to girls throwing themselves on him. He’s been kissed and had sex with girls he felt nothing for other than primal arousal before. The feeling of being approached and hit on wasn’t new to him. This felt different though. He felt as if he’d made a friend in Adeline and her sister. To have Adeline approach him in such a way made him freeze where he sat. It made him feel like an awkward pre-teen all over again. The thought of kissing her, or pursuing something more with Adeline never crossed 2D’s mind. He didn’t have feelings for either of the sisters in that way. So why did he suddenly feel guilty towards Amelie for being caught on the verge of a kiss with her sister?

               Desperate for a change of topic, Adeline blurted out, “S-So, are you hungry? Have you eaten?”

               “Yeah, I could eat,” Amelie said after some consideration, dropping her smug smirk.

               “Great, I’ll go get us all some food! Meet you at camp!” Adeline dashed off, in a hurry to squeeze out of the awkward situation. She was never good with being awkward.

               2D stood there by the stream with Amelie in the pinkish twilight light. He didn’t know what to say, and his heart still hammered against his chest. “Listen, what you saw—“ He tried to explain. Amelie put a hand up to silence him.

               “You haven’t got to say anything. I’m going to guess my sister finally told you how she feels about you. I’m sorry to interrupt the big moment,” she said. 2D heard a rushing in his ears as she spoke. “Let’s just forget this happened, okay?” Amelie began to walk away, but turned back to say, “just, if you guys hook up or whatever, just treat her right.”

               2D barely heard any of that. He was stunned by the implications that Adeline had feelings for him. Suddenly, he felt guilty again, but not towards Amelie; he felt guilty towards Adeline. In a rush of vertigo, like he was being slammed back into himself, he realized that Amelie was gently shaking him.

               “You alright?” She looked concerned. Had he said or done something odd or worrisome? She was still staring at him, waiting for an answer. He simply nodded in reply, no words coming to him, his mouth dry.

A pause, and then Amelie pursed her lips together. Her hand slid from his shoulder down his arm and tugged at his wrist, urging him to follow her back to camp. He had half a mind to grab her hand, just as she was letting go, and hold tight to it.

               And suddenly he was stunned again, coming to the realization that perhaps the reason he felt guilty towards Adeline, was because the feelings she had for him, he had for another.

               Quietly, 2D followed Amelie back to camp, watching her as she took quick, stern steps to keep pace ahead of his equal, but long strides.


	4. Hoping For The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's escalating.

               A beetle buzzed lazily by over 2D’s face as he lay on the ground near his tent, the slight noise irritating his sensitive headache. He felt so unmotivated to do anything. In the past two weeks, it felt as if the sun was trying to slowly roast them all alive. The heat was unrelenting, even at night. If 2D could walk around in just his underwear, he would, he swore. His fellow soldiers shared the same thoughts. They all went about camp in just their pants and their thin undershirts or completely shirtless, huddling in the shade of their tents and of nearby trees, wherever there might be a chance of it being just slightly cooler. They had marched far away from that lovely cool stream long ago, and now the last resort to stave off heatstroke was being half naked and complaining a lot.

               2D pulled himself off the grass, some stalks coming loose and sticking to his sweaty body and tangled hair, to march sluggishly to the medical tent. Andy, the resident MD, and John, the other medical staff were sitting inside, towels draped over their heads.

               “Your sunburns are never going to get better if you keep sitting outside like that,” Andy muttered, glancing up from his dog-eared book as 2D wetted a towel to throw over himself.

               “My sunburns aren’ going to bet better ‘til I get ou’ of this damn heat,” he grumbled. This constant hot weather was putting him in a bad mood. 2D felt like he was going to snap at any time, but he did his best to keep his temper. If only he could go for a swim, or sit in the shade and relax with a proper chat with the sisters, he would feel better, but there wasn’t any water for miles, and Adeline and Amelie were gone a lot lately, sometimes for days on end. Adeline had rejoined her squad on missions, and that meant no one to hang out with during the day.

               Four days later and two more camp sites destinations, and still no scout team. 2D was getting anxious. More and more planes were flying overhead. He couldn’t tell if they were friend or foe, but it didn’t help his or anyone else’s nerves. They all feared the planes were loaded with more bombs, and that at any time, they could be shelled in their own bedrolls in the night.

               And then finally, the news they were all waiting for came. The Lieutenant gathered what was left of her troops together. It seemed like a small group now, especially with six soldiers gone on recon; the man who broke his leg was air-lifted out, along with a few others who came down with heatstroke. There were a few missing who hadn’t gone through the medical tent, and they were suspected to have gone AWOL, as they had seemingly disappeared overnight. None of the commanding officers seemed worried about it though.

               As 2D came out of his tent, he looked around, hoping that the news was that the scout team had come back. He searched for Adeline’s and Amelie’s faces, but no one from the recon squad were there. Shoulders slumped, he joined the other soldiers in front of the Lieutenant and took a knee.

                Lana Thorne was a tall woman, almost as tall as 2D it seemed, though he’d never had the nerve to stand by her to confirm this true or false, as just her aura was intimidating. He would rather keep out of line of sight of anyone who could yell and condemn as loud as her. She was in full battledress, jacket buttoned up to her throat, not a bead of sweat on her dark skin. Her discipline and tenacity were on full display in front of her half-naked, uncomfortably moist troops. There was a large map propped up on an easel next to her.

               “Girls and boys, the day you prayed for has finally come. I’ve just received orders that the war is over.” A stunned silence met her words before a roar of cheering and happy cries erupted amongst the soldiers. “DON’T. Get too excited!” Lieutenant Throne called over the applaud. It died down, faces looking wary and scared and hopeless again. “The war may be over, but we’re not done here. You don’t get to go home just yet.” Many people jumped up, angrily shouting questions and demands.

               Lana waited patiently until most of them had stopped yelling, she and her Sergeants standing stock still, arms behind their backs, glaring out. When they had all settled down, she continued. “You wanted the war to end, didn’t you? Well this is what it TAKES to end it! To make SURE we don’t have to COME BACK.” No one dared retort back.

“There is a city just south of us,” she slapped a long, metal pointer against the map, “currently occupied by the terrorist group. I’ve received orders to go and take it back. Our recon team is near there now, watching them and gathering necessary information to win this tough battle ahead.”

               Scared murmurs bubbled amongst the crowd. “You mean we’ll have to take up arms? Guns? Shoot and kill?”

               Lana pursed her lips together in grim confirmation. “Yes, that’s right.” She had half a mind to ask sarcastically if they were ready to die, but now was not the time for that. “We’ll be joined by three other teams. It’s a large city and we don’t want to be outnumbered. We will take north, and all together surround these goddamn bastards and kill them where they sleep. Eight sniper teams, two from each squadron will take the rooftops and pick off any unpleasant surprises that may wait for us. My boys,” she looked squarely at four people who perked up, “are going to be here, and here.” Lana circled two areas near the top of the map as she spoke. “If we retreat, WHICH WE WON’T,” she snapped the last part, “We converge here,” another circle on the map. “Are there any questions?” There was a still silence. No one even dared to breathe. 2D watched from the back, fingertips together in anxiousness, headache flaring.

               The Lieutenant began walking away. “I want my snipers and their spotters in my tent, NOW. The rest of you get your shit and your nerves together. We leave at midnight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be prepared for the next chapter. It's gonna get rough.


	5. Hoping For Bloodshed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for bloodshed, gore, and grief at the end.
> 
> **This chapter is written mostly in Adeline's perspective.

               The trek to the rendezvous point was quiet, sullen, and the fear in the air could be cut with a butter knife. 2D gripped his stomach nervously. He couldn’t eat dinner; he was too scared of what they would march into later that night. All kinds of horrible scenarios were flashing through his head and made his knees feel like jelly. 2D ran a shaking hand through his hair and pulled at it. He shouldn’t be thinking about things like that anymore, lest he abandon everyone and run. He forced himself to focus on the gun bouncing at his hip. It made him feel braver.

               The unit left at midnight on the dot, everything packed on their backs, and for a moment, it felt like they were just moving to a new campsite, like they always did, but 2D knew this trip would end in a much more sinister place. They had been marching for a few hours, and when he thought they might go all night, they reached the top of a particularly steep hill. Over the bend lay what could only be described as a tent city. There were more people here than he’d seen in a long time and suddenly the rock in the pit of his stomach lifted. He and his fellow platoon mates were ordered to set up camp and get ready for a briefing, so 2D branched off on his own. Ignoring the fatigues, he could pretend he was just taking a stroll through the London streets at night.

               There were so many new faces, so much going on that he wasn’t sure where to look. Decidedly, he marched to an area that was a little more deserted. He threw his stuff down and sat on his pack, fingers pressing at his temple. Now was not a good time to have sensory overload. He had a headache now, and though it had started suddenly, it was surprisingly strong. It felt as if his wildly beating heart was pumping all the blood into his brain as quick as possible.

               “2D!” Great, the headache was getting so bad that he was having auditory hallucinations. “2D!” He sorely wished he had painkillers. “Hey, 2D! Oh, my god!” He took a moment to register that he had never had auditory hallucinations before and looked up. Adeline was running towards him, Amelie in tow. Excited, 2D jumped up just in time for Adeline to crash into his arms for a crushing hug. She squeezed him so hard, he lost his breath. As they embraced, 2D looked up at Amelie, who gave him a huge smile and a soft punch to the shoulder.

               Adeline pulled away, looking up at him with the biggest smile he’d ever seen on her face. “God, it’s great to see you! I’ve mi— _we’ve_ missed you!” She gave her sister a light slap on the arm, “isn’t that right Amelie?”

               Perking up, Amelie drew her shoulders up and pressed her lips together in a kind of forced grin. “Yup! Missed you lots!” 2D was blushing now. He felt as if all the blood in his brain was in his cheeks.  
               “Oh, you’ve just gotten here right? You should come set up next to us!” Adeline exclaimed, picking up 2D’s pack. “It’ll be just like normal, except that we might you know,” she ran a finger across her throat and made a face, laughing nervously. 2D and Amelie just looked at her. “That’s not… that’s not funny... Uhm, well let’s go. I’ll lead the way!”

               Adeline rushed off in a hurry, desperate to get away from her own awkwardness. Amelie looked at 2D. “I’m… I’m sorry about that. She’s just really nervous.” He nodded, thinking she was nervous about the huge battle ahead. “She hasn’t stopped talking about you since… Well I guess since we left camp all those days ago, and with everything else going on…” 2D felt his heart skip several guilty beats because since they had left, he had thought more about Amelie than of Adeline.

               Now that he got a good look at her, 2D realized that half of her hair was gone. He grabbed her shoulders, “Now, wai’ a minute. Let me see you.” The red bump on her forehead had disappeared, save for a yellowing bruise. The singed hair that had been above that had been shaved off. She looked like a spunky punk rocker with that cocked brow and witty smirk of hers, a little worse for wear than he remembered, but 2D’s heart swelled at the sight of her. He ran his hand over the soft fuzz of her haircut and laughed, giddy from the feeling in his chest and the tickling on his palm. “You look…You look great! This suits you… You look like a rock star!” He stuck out his tongue and gave her the sign of the horns.

               She laughed, running her own hand over the fuzz. “Yeah, well I totally rocked the singed look, but it was time to move on.” Amelie reached up to touch 2D’s face, fingers going over his straggly facial hair. “You look different too.” Her hand brought an indescribable feeling. If 2D died in the morning, he could die a happy man. “But if you’re going to keep the mustache and beard, I highly suggest trimming it. Clean it up a bit; makes you look less scary. Though if you ask me,” she looked him in the eyes. Like she was snapping out of a reverie, Amelie let out a breath and gave him a quick pat to the cheek, “I like the beardless look much better; suits your youthful personality.” She stepped back now, hands in her pockets and jerking her head in the direction her sister went. “C’mon. Adeline’s probably got your stuff set up, and you must be tired.”

 

               When dawn broke, 2D was standing in a large tent with Andy, Mike, who was the MD from another platoon, and three other medical officers. John and the rest had gone off with the rest of them to work as field medics. They were on standby, gurneys prepped, equipment ready to be used, gloves and masks on. Adeline and Amelie had marched off with the others, and while they weren’t exactly on the front lines, they were heading right into the fray. 2D remembered how they looked when they left. Adeline was pale, looking scared out of her wits, but determined, clutching the strap of her rifle like her life depended on it. For all anyone knew, it might very well. Amelie was beside her, holding her sister’s hand, face grim, and knuckles white on her gun. Adeline looked back at 2D as they left, eyes wide. He stayed out until he could no longer see the mass of soldiers any longer. When he could no longer discern them from the darkness, he slumped back into the tent, heart ramming against his ribcage.

               It was quiet for an agonizingly long time, there were no cricket chirps or bird calls or any summer morning noise. If something didn’t make a noise soon, 2D felt like he might rip own heart out, just to hear something.

               A thunderous crack from a long range rifle rang through the air and suddenly it was like the earth cracked open and the noise from Hell was flooding out. He regretted his desperate wish.

              

               The mass of soldiers were divided into many teams of five and ten. Adeline and nine others crept up to the empty city square, guns drawn, sweeping the road as they walked. Everything was dark, as if light had never graced this part of the world. Brand new buildings looked decrepit due to constant bombs and gunfire. Seemingly innocent cars loomed eerily in the middle of the street, possibly hiding an ambush. Adeline’s nerves were crackling, on edge.

               She looked to her side, expecting Amelie there to give her a reassuring smile or comforting squeeze of the hand, but her sister wasn’t there. Amelie had been separated into a smaller squad and sent to the west of the city. Adeline swallowed hard and turned her focus back down the barrel of her gun. The squadron leader held up a fist, signaling that everyone stop. He held two fingers to his eyes and then pointed forward, at a small fountain in the middle of the plaza. The thing looked ghostly, the white stone shining pale in the dark, the figure of a tall woman towering over them, staring with dead eyes. Without water dancing about, the fountain looked sad, lonely.

               Suddenly, the snap of a high caliber sniper rifle ripped through the silence. A gun clattered from a top floor window in the building on the other side of the fountain. The noise seemed to have roused the city. In a second, men and women rose, ghost like, from behind cars and stepped out from buildings, guns pressed against their shoulders, barrels forward. The clacking of their gunfire filled the air, and it was like there were no other noises in the world.

               Adeline and her teammates scattered. She dove behind a decrepit wall and pressed her back to it. She took a moment to compose herself. With shaking fingers, she made sure her gun was loaded. Of course it was; she was just wasting time in the hopes that everyone would die before she did. She peeked over the concrete and pulled the trigger, aiming at the mass of soldiers taking cover behind the fountain. The _ratatatatatata_ of her rifle drowned out all of her fearful thoughts. Firing in short bursts, she became braver as she saw two of the opposing men collapse, one of whose head split open like a melon, spraying the other with blood. It was a horrifying sight to witness, but she hoped deep down that they were felled by her gunfire. A bullet or two whizzed past her, but with this new courage, she didn’t back down, continuing to shoot into the scattering people opposite her. It was a good thing they were too far to see in detail, she thought. She wouldn’t be as willful to gun them down if she could see their faces.

               Her cover suddenly exploded in large clouds of dust and pieces of debris as someone returned fire on her. Suddenly, Adeline’s fears returned, slamming into her like a truck. She ducked back down, eyes shut and chest heaving. Her fingers were numb from gripping her gun so tight. Upon regaining her wits, Adeline looked around the edge. They were no longer focusing her, it seemed, and there as a clear shot of some of the enemy soldiers kneeling at a window. Pulling back to rest against the wall, Adeline was met with an older woman ducking behind another piece of debris in front of her. The woman wore raggedy civilian clothes, hair tied loosely back. They stared, wide-eyed, at one another for a moment, before the woman whipped out a magnum and opened fired on Adeline.

               Eight booming shots rang out between them. When it stopped, there was the longest split second between them, where Adeline had her eyes shut, certain that being almost at point blank distance, she had definitely been hit. The woman kneeled in shock, gun still smoking. She had missed all shots, all eight bullets embedded into the concrete over Adeline’s shoulder. Upon realizing she wasn’t dead, Adeline opened fire, not bothering to take aim, spraying her rifle into the woman. Her shirt blossomed red, and blood dribbled from the corner of her mouth before she fell over, lifeless, eyes still trained on Adeline.

               She wanted to scream in terror but her voice wouldn’t come. As the blood pooled around the woman, Adeline retreated further against the wall and kicked the gore away as best she could. She considered just running now; just leaving and never coming back. Who cared if she could be court martialed?

               A grenade went off somewhere near her and the combination of the explosion and dust being flung into her eyes snapped her out of her treacherous thoughts. As she tried to clean her eyes, she could hear her commanding officer on the other side of her barricade, barking orders and relaying information into the walkie-talkie strapped to his shoulder. He mentioned the Sigma unit, which was the team Amelie had been assigned and suddenly Adeline remembered that her sister was somewhere out there in this firefight too, possibly hurt or dying. She didn’t dare imagine Amelie’s dead body, eyes glazed and as lifeless as this corpse in front of her.

               A new, angry vigor returned to her then. She knew that not everyone would survive this fight, but she wasn’t going to let her little sister die here. The battle became a blur to her and all she remembered was the jackhammer-like kickback of the rifle against her shoulder and the deafening explosions of grenades around her. Dawn had broken when they reclaimed the north side of the city. Sniper shots could still be heard in the distance, and so Adeline’s unit and several others descended further south to help recapture the other quadrants of the city while the rest stayed to hold their victory.

               When the echoes of gunfire finally died down, the sun had risen directly over them. The city was theirs. Not of one of the dozens of soldiers around her spoke, and the silence stuck in her ears like cotton. Everywhere Adeline looked, there were bodies and blood of both her allies and enemies alike. She was too scared to look at them, frightened that she might see a face she knew, or that her deepest nightmare might be realized and she’d see Amelie faced down in her own blood.

               As other troops were charged with doing a last sweep of the city, Adeline and several others were ordered to lay out the bodies in a line. Those of the enemy would be laid out separately to get a proper burial, while those of her fellow soldiers would be prepped to be air lifted out, so they could be claimed and buried by their families. By mid-afternoon, all of the dead had been gathered. She didn’t recognize most of them but found that at least half of her team had perished in battle.

 

               By nightfall, the rest of the troops streamed in and set up camp to hold the city; they’d have to stay until they received orders to move out. Obviously it was too early for the citizens to return, so for now, it would be a city of soldiers. Adeline had yet to find Amelie, but she wasn’t one of the dead, so that’s all she could ask for, for now. The mass funeral was quick, quiet, and sobering. Regardless on whose side those bodies belonged to, they were all just dead now, and burying dozens of them had a way of reminding one that all this fighting was fruitless in a way.

               As Adeline walked back to her tent, she felt nothing. It was strangely numbing to see that many corpses be laid to rest. Perhaps it was because one of those bodies had been the woman who tried to ambush her. Adeline remembered very clearly the feeling of wanting to throw her body haphazardly into the mass grave, a final “fuck you, I lived” sort of farewell. She didn’t though; it wasn’t in her to be spiteful. She wanted to grieve for the woman, whose body was riddled with bullet holes, but at the same time, Adeline was very aware that she could have been eight bullets away from being put in a grave herself.

               When she arrived at her tent, there was someone sitting outside of it, their figure lit up by the camp fire that those others who camped by her had set up. Drawing closer, Adeline realized that it was Amelie’s slender figure hunched over. Feeling short of breath, she quickened her pace, and practically ran, calling her sister’s name. Never mind how she found her, Adeline was just relieved to finally see her. Amelie looked around, and recognizing her sister, stood up, arms spread open. Adeline crashed into her sister’s hug. She could tell Amelie was exhausted, but she just need to make sure that she was actually still alive, and not just a figment of her war-torn, fatigued mind. She pulled away, grabbing Amelie’s face to inspect her by the fire light. It was hard to tell, but she had definitely been bleeding, but it could have been someone else’s blood splashed onto her. She was covered in cuts, and it was hard to tell from what exactly, but perhaps these were just the common injuries of war. Her battledress was missing a sleeve on one side and shredded on the other, leaving her arms to be exposed to injury as well and her rifle still hung at her side, swinging loosely.

               “I thought you were dead,” Adeline whispered, breathless. Amelie seemed to have no words; she grimaced and shook her head. Tears were coming to her eyes, but Adeline wiped them away with her thumbs. “No, no tears; we’re okay. We’re together again, that’s all that matters.” Her voice was breaking with relief, and suddenly, she was crying too. War was not where they belonged. She just wanted to go home, with her sister, and resume life as if none of this had ever happened.

               Amelie patted her sister softly on the back, making quiet shushing noises as Adeline began to sob. Other people began to look around at them, some sympathizing, others merely shaking their heads and walking away. Adeline began to collapse, all the strength from the fight seeping out of her. She grabbed at Amelie’s jacket, trying to stand but gave that up quickly and submitted to her knees, pulling Amelie with down her and weeping heavily onto her shoulder.


	6. Hoping For Music

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Full of music and feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW at the end.
> 
> * <\--- At this cue, play this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U01nNCs8G4U
> 
> ** <\--- At this cue, play this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lAjs75dkho

In just a week, things were bustling within the City of Soldiers, which is what everyone had come to call their new home for the time being. There were so many people everywhere that 2D thought that the entire British Army had come to squat here. It was like a huge camping trip; on one side of the city, the officers had set up a huge cavernous tent for meetings and battle strategy planning. Everyone else set up where they could manage, but no one pitched inside any of the buildings. They were all too wary of left over traps, ambushes, or secret entryways that any surviving terrorist could use to sneak in at the dead of night and slit their sleeping throats. The town square was left mostly as it was, save for a bit of cleaning up, and a huge fire pit being set up there, as a sort of community cooking and dining area. In a way, it really felt like home to 2D, more of a home than he’d known in over a year anyway.

               When the dust had settled after the battle, 2D found Adeline and Amelie by the city fountain were the majority of the unoccupied gathered, mostly unharmed, guns slung over their shoulders. They looked a little worse for wear, and were holding each other’s hands tightly, but otherwise, they were there and alive. It was 2D who went running to them this time. He pulled them both into a simultaneous hug with his long arms and he didn’t let go until he was sure he calmed himself down. Their reunion was tearful, most of the crying came from 2D; he was just so worried about them. That night, they all sat together, eating dinner. It felt like it had before, when they were just a lone platoon, traveling from one campsite to the next to keep busy.

               Eventually, 2D found the courage to ask about what happened to them during the firefight. When Adeline recounted what happened, she had spoken quickly, anxiety wracking her voice; she even cried a little, but she made sure they knew it was tears of relief, relief of just being able to make it out alive. Amelie refused to speak of her experience. She just pursed her lips together and shook her head in silent decline. She didn’t seem upset about it, so 2D and Adeline prodded a little more, but Amelie gave nothing up. Though curious about how she ended up covered in blood with her sleeves shredded, 2D respected that she simply did not want to relive it, and dropped the subject. Later on, Adeline would reveal to him that though she didn’t know any more than he did, she did know that none of Amelie’s four other teammates survived the battle.

               Things had settled nicely as time went on, and all of the wartime habits and gear seemed to fall into a kind of normalcy. Adeline and Amelie were sometimes gone, either separately or together, on patrol at night to keep watch. They all always carried firearms, morning briefings were like an accompaniment to breakfast, and getting in line for meals was as commonplace to 2D now as hanging out with the sisters. Although he was often with them, he felt like he was seeing Amelie less and less. When he asked Adeline where she was, she’d scowl and say that she was “busy”. She never elaborated. And since she clearly didn’t want to talk about it, he thought he’d go to the source and try that route.

               Once, 2D asked Amelie if she could give him a haircut. Amelie laughed at him, saying she was no hair stylist and that he’d be better just letting it grow. “I just want it out of the way,” he replied. So she whipped out the straight razor she had used for her own hair and sat him down. 2D didn’t really care whether or not his hair was getting long; he just wanted a moment alone with Amelie so he could satiate his curiosity of her disappearance. But once she started running her fingers through his hair though, he was immediately undone and lost all reason as to why he was there. When she was done, she crouched down to his level, and ran her fingers through his hair from root to tip, measuring both sides against each other. 2D became spellbound by this and found that he couldn’t stop the hand that was reaching up to grab hers. “Amelie, I—“ She looked expectantly at him, making him lose all words. “I… want to borrow your razor, to shave my face… Can I?” She handed him the blade and then proceeded to brush the hair off of his shoulders. It was only later, when he was finally clean shaven, covered in cuts (he wasn’t great at using a straight razor) and in bed, that he remembered he was going to ask her about where she went, and cursed himself for getting distracted.

               One hot evening, 2D was sitting with Adeline, advising her on melody construction as she strummed on her guitar. They were waiting on Amelie to appear from wherever it was she went off to on her own. Several people from their on platoon had requested music night, and some others, overhearing this, had seemed interested, so they agreed. 2D was excited. It seemed so long since he’d heard them sing together.

               After a while, Amelie finally appeared. 2D looked up immediately when he spotted her coming out of the darkness. Like the other women, she didn’t wear the jacket of her battledress; it was just too hot. She had rolled her tank shirt up all the way and tucked it under her breasts. Adeline found it embarrassing to see her baby sister exposing “so much in such a crude way,” but 2D liked it. He stole glances at her whenever had the chance. Her skin was flushed pink from the heat and she had a smudge of dirt on the tip of her nose, stuck there with sweat. Probably not the sexiest looks, but 2D found himself charmed.

               “Hey, sorry that took so long. Lost track of time,” Amelie said as she slapped her arm, smashing a mosquito. Adeline scoffed and made a face, clearly annoyed, though she said nothing. Amelie rolled her eyes and helped her sister to her feet. 2D followed silently behind them as they made their way to the town square. The carved woman of the fountain statue still stood, mostly undamaged. Her wistful smile and dead stare always creeped him out.

               Word had spread it seemed, because the square was bustling with people waiting around for the sisters (maybe not JUST for them, but 2D liked believe they got more credit than they were getting now). As Adeline sat at the edge of the fountain tuning her guitar, Amelie went into the crowd to borrow a helmet from one of the men sitting nearby. People were already gathering close together, drawn by the sounds of the strumming. 2D chose to stand about halfway back. He wanted to be front and center, but he didn’t want to seem too eager, and this way, he could stare at Amelie without being so conspicuous.

               As night began to fall, Adeline strummed away on her guitar, and Amelie patted out a beat on the helmet that she held between her knees, their voices entwining gently. Their tones were vastly different, just like everything else about them, save for their looks maybe. Adeline had a high, clear pitch, while Amelie’s was low and sultry. They made a great duet.

               (*) “This next song is dedicated to someone very special to me,” Adeline announced, eyes cast down and cheeks tinted pink. 2D knew she was talking about him, and his stomach lurched uncomfortably. The song wasn’t some jaunty sing-a-long to make one feel better. It was a love song. As they played, people in the crowd snapped and clapped along to the beat. It described not only their wartime circumstances, but also their personal desires to be close to the ones they loved. Adeline was the main singer for this song, and while her voice was lovely as ever, 2D could only keep his eyes on Amelie as she sang backup. When she sang a chorus all on her own, she looked up right at him.

 _Come together, we deserve it_  
               _What kind of life will our babies have i_ _f we don't change up and make it last?_  
_It starts right here, starts right now_  
_We'll love and hope for..._

               2D’s heart nearly stopped in his chest. Amelie was looking straight at him, smiling and singing about coming together and future babies. He wasn’t sure if that’s what he wanted, but he was excited about any hint of a relationship with her. The song ended shortly after and Amelie looked down, still grinning ear to ear. This was a good sign. He was so entranced in catching her eye that 2D didn’t realize that he was slowly making his way up to the front of the crowd. He intended to talk to Amelie, about his feelings, about everything.

               “Well it looks like our local celebrity might want to perform a song!” Adeline’s voice broke him out of his trance. The next thing he knew, several hands were pulling him to the front of the crowd, and pushing him towards the sisters. He tried to refuse; he just wanted to hear Adeline and Amelie sing tonight, but the crowd began to get a bit rambunctious and chanted his name until he coincided.

               (**) 2D sat next to Adeline on the edge of the fountain. Before he could even ask what he should sing, she began to strum out a gentler version of “On Melancholy Hill”. She and Amelie harmonized the opening melody together, giving the song a very carefree feel. He couldn’t help but smile as the words and memories of the song came back to him.

_Up on melancholy hill_

_There's a plastic tree_

_Are you here with me_

_Just looking out on the day_

_Of another dream_

               His voice cracked a bit as he sang the opening lines. It had been so long since he’d used his voice to sing, and he hadn’t even warmed up yet. But the crowd still cheered him on, and that familiar encouragement of people who loved his music pushed him onward to keep singing.

_Well you can't get what you want_

_But you can get me_

_So let's set out to sea_

_'Cause you are my medicine_

_When you're close to me_

_When you're close to me_

               2D turned to look at Amelie. She was sitting on the ground, leaned up against the fountain, patting the beat of the song on her helmet. She looked like she was genuinely enjoying herself. Probably the first time he’d seen her like this in a long time. He wanted to have this image burned into his eyelids, so when he closed them, he could always see Amelie smiling. Even at this distance, 2D felt the electricity of her presence; it was enough to make his face flush red. It felt so indescribable to be so close to her. He was so focused on this thought though that he didn’t notice Adeline turning her head slightly to look at him. She saw him turned in her direction and her cheeks burned with infatuation. She thought he was looking at her, singing to her.

_Just looking out for the day_

_When you’re close to me_

_When you’re close to me~_

               It was decided. 2D was going to get Amelie alone tonight and admit his feelings to her. He simply couldn’t hold it in any longer. They were at war and if he died tomorrow, he wouldn’t want these feelings buried with him. Even if she rejected him, it would be worth it.

_When you’re close to… me~_

* * *

                 2D was back in the crowd when Adeline and Amelie were finishing the last song. The people gathered clapped enthusiastically before getting up to go to bed. It was well into the night; someone had started a large campfire nearby, and others had lit stubby, mismatched candles and placed them around the sisters for more lighting. The atmosphere was all quite romantic. 2D knew that now was the time. His heart was banging wildly against his rib cage, his palms were sweating, and his dry throat was clenching and unclenching in a nervous tick. Amelie stood and dusted off her pants. She looked absolutely lovely in the yellow glow of the candlelight. She stretched a bit and exchanged a few words to her sister. Then she looked out at him, and she smiled a genuine smile. She extended a hand outward, making a beckoning motion. 2D gulped. This was it. He was going to go congratulate them and then take Amelie’s hand and ask for a moment alone with her. He took one step forward and then felt someone brush past him.

               It was a brunet man with enormous muscles and a “tough guy” walk, someone he’d seen around camp these past few days; he was from another platoon. 2D didn’t know much about him other than that. The man walked up to Amelie and put his huge arms around her. 2D watched as she playfully put the helmet she had used on the man’s head and pulled him down for a kiss by the straps.

               2D’s stomach churned painfully as he watched. The man pushed back a strand of hair behind her ear. They exchanged an unheard conversation and kissed again. The quick, anxious beating of 2D’s heart turned dark. His breathing came in short, heavy huffs and his knees began to tremble. Suddenly, everything hurt, and he could feel a migraine coming on. Every show of affection or small interaction between them was painful to 2D, but he couldn’t look away. Their expressions were becoming soft now, and it looked like they were having a much quieter, more intimate exchange. The man gently cupped her cheek, and she placed a hand over his. He moved in for another kiss, and the way Amelie blissfully shut her eyes was so agonizingly tortuous to 2D that he clutched at his chest. His eyes were burning and feeling wet. Maybe when she was singing, she wasn’t looking at him; maybe she was looking at this guy, and in his lovesick state, he wanted to believe she meant those words for him. These thoughts hurt just as much as being punched in the gut.

               “Are you alright?” Adeline was there suddenly. 2D was so enraptured in watching Amelie unknowingly hurt him that he never noticed her sister walking up to him. She had her guitar slung around her back, leaving both hands free to grasp 2D’s shoulders as he fought back his hateful tears. “What’s wrong?” she queried again.

               “I—“ 2D wiped at his eyes angrily. “It’s nuthin'. The music you guys were playing just brought back a lot of memories,” he lied, finally tearing away from Amelie and her mystery man. “It was all very… moving.”

               Adeline looked very surprised but said nothing. “Listen, do you want to get out of here?” 2D vigorously nodded and began stamping away. Adeline turned towards Amelie and her man, gave a disgusted look and ran after 2D.

               They found themselves in the forests just outside of the main camp, far from anyone else. 2D was pacing and muttering angrily while Adeline sat there watching him, knees drawn to her chest. After a while, she reached up and grabbed his hand but he hardly seemed to notice until she pulled at him to sit next to her. Reluctantly, 2D obliged, hands clenching and unclenching, knee bouncing up and down; if he didn’t move in some way, he felt he might explode in a huge fit of negative feelings.

               Adeline put a hand on his knee to stop his fidgeting. “2D, listen,” she grabbed his chin and turned him to face her. “There’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you for a long time.” She looked nervous, but 2D was hardly paying attention. “There’s no easy way of saying it so I’ll just say it. I like you; a lot. Ever since Gorillaz debuted, practically. I’ve followed your music and your journey through everything, and I know you’re going to say it’s just a celebrity crush but it’s more than just that.” She was talking quite a bit, gesturing a great deal, and her face had turned a dark beet red. 2D was still absorbed in his own thoughts to really pay any mind to it though. He was looking at Adeline, but all he could see was Amelie. He imagined that it was her sitting there next to him, talking and blushing and saying all these sweet things to him, and his heart ached so much.

               “—2D, I guess what I’m trying to say is that… I think it’s much more than that. I think I… I think I love you.” This caught his attention.

               He sat quietly for a moment, staring at her, gaze owl like. “…Say tha' again.”

               Adeline looked startled, and she blushed even harder, but she complied. “I said, I think… no. I know… I love you. Yes, I lo—“ 2D cut her off by smashing his lips onto hers in a messy kiss. There was a moment that she took to recover from gasping hard before she started to kiss him back. She placed her hands on his chest, doing her best to turn the kiss gentle, but 2D was just filled with too much destructive emotion to care. After a while, he pulled back and looked at her. He knew it was Adeline he was kissing, but she looked so much like Amelie. He wanted to be with her so badly that his heart hurt. There was no harm in pretending.

               2D brushed her hair back. She looked at him, her eyes filled with want. He put his hands on her shoulders and kissed her again, this time much more gently, eyes shut tight. It was passionate and painful, and great and tortuous, all at once. She began nipping at his bottom lip and he slipped his tongue into her mouth, and she moaned and gasped, grabbing his identity discs, for he wore no shirt; just boots and his fatigue pants, which began to feel very uncomfortable.

               As 2D ran his hands up her neck and into her hair, she ran hers down his chest and stopped at his belt. He encouraged her to make the next move by pushing his hips forward into her hands, all the while still kissing fervently. He felt her quickly undo his belt first, then his zipper, and the next thing he knew, his pants and briefs were around his thighs and his erection was in her hands. She began to pump up and down, and 2D gasped. It had been so long since someone else had done this. It felt wrong, but he just squeezed his eyes tighter and imagined that it was Amelie pleasing him. It felt even worse then. But he didn’t care.

               He couldn’t continue on with the kissing at this rate. 2D pressed his forehead against hers, his hands grabbing her hair tightly as she continued on. Not even two minutes passed and the bubbling in his stomach became stronger. He was going to cum at this rate. 2D grabbed her wrist and pulled her hand away, leaving his dick painfully throbbing.

               Taking a moment to catch his breath, he swallowed the horrible feelings that were threatening to vomit forward. She tried to kiss him, but he pushed her down, and lifted her shirt and bra. Usually the sight of breasts got him even more excited, but he knew who these belonged to, and he kept his eyes dutifully trained on them, lest they wander up towards her face. 2D toyed with them for a while, earning a positive reaction from her. As he sucked on one her nipples, he saw in his peripheral one of her hands wandering down to undo her own pants and plunge into her panties to play with herself.

               2D kept at this for a few minutes longer until he decided to just go through with it. He yanked off her pants and threw them away from them before pushing his own further down his legs. Normally, he would engage in foreplay, lots of fingering and cunnilingus, but 2D just couldn’t bring himself to care about her pleasure. Roughly, he spread her thighs and positioned his dick at her opening before thrusting slowly forward, eliciting a long, drawn out moan from her. He didn’t bother to silence her, they were probably too far away for anybody to hear anyway. She was making his favourite kind of music, but he simply couldn’t enjoy it; he just pushed further in. He shuddered at the feeling of being inside a woman again, goosebumps popping up all over his body.

               Pressing her knees to her chest, 2D thrust hard into her, relishing in the feeling of raw sex. It had been so long. 2D tried to keep his eyes pressed shut, but it was a habit of his to keep them open, to watch his partner as he fucked her. His gaze kept drifting up to her face, causing a horrible, guilty feeling to simmer inside him and make him begin to lose his erection. He would shut his eyes tight and imagine another person beneath him to bring it back quickly, before he began to show signs of pushing rope. After a while of this back and forth, 2D pulled her to her feet and pushed her against a nearby tree. She was faced away from him, bent forward now. The back of her head looked well enough like Amelie, so he could work with this. With pants around his ankles, 2D pushed back inside and continued on.

               It was a short five minutes after this that he felt the familiar bubbling of a rising orgasm. 2D pumped harder and faster, resolving to find his solace in the next few seconds. Before he knew it, he was cumming. “Fuck!” He pulled out as fast as he could and released himself into the grass beneath them. 2D was left trembling after he was all done. He was sure that she hadn’t cum yet, but he was just too concerned in his own bliss to care. It was just too short a time period anyway, not that he cared about trying to impress anyone right now.

               2D stumbled back and lay down, breathing heavy. He didn’t feel any better; usually burying himself into someone helped him bury his feelings, but not this time. Adeline groaned as she lay down next to him, pantsless. She cuddled up into his chest, and kissed his neck gently. She seemed satisfied. That heavy feeling of his heart came back ten-fold now, along with a headache and a horrible guilt that bubbled in his guts.

               By the gods, what had he done?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've edited the tags, so make sure you check that out.


	7. Hoping to Survive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it took me so long to get this out! Also, I edited the tags again.
> 
> Gore and death below below!

               2D found that no matter what he was doing, he had been in a terrible mood lately; not even sex had cheered him up. He spent the following two days avoiding Amelie, and denying Adeline anymore intercourse. His excuse was that they didn’t have protection, and he didn’t want her to get pregnant. That didn’t stop her from being overly affectionate though, which made 2D incredibly uncomfortable. He was sure that Adeline believed they were an item now, and he wanted to tell her they weren’t, but he wasn’t sure how to breach the topic. It was all so awkward already, and he didn’t want to risk hurting her feelings.

               Three nights after the fountain, Amelie and her mystery man found 2D sitting by himself on the outskirts of town, a dangerous thing to do on your own, but he wasn’t the only one doing it, so he was sure it was relatively safe. They were taking a stroll when they found him sitting on a large piece of debris, wallowing in his emotions. She introduced him to Simon, a tall (though not as tall as him, 2D would proudly note), brown-haired definition of a ruggedly handsome man, complete with muscles (who wanted to be a beef cake anyway). This was definitely the guy who had so lovingly brushed Amelie’s hair behind her ear that night. Against all of 2D’s wishes, they stayed and chatted with him; he was too cowardly to tell them to go away. He learned that they had dated during their last years in secondary school and were forced to end their relationship after their graduation, when Simon told her that he was going away to join the military. Just 2D’s luck; by pure coincidence, their platoons happened to convene in the same city and reunite them.

               He wanted to die; just sitting here with them was agony. 2D never thought he was the jealous type; he had never felt like this before towards anyone or anything and he hated it. The feeling had birthed a horrid monster inside of him that took root in the pit of his gut and clawed at his heart. It was times like this that he severely missed drowning himself in hard drugs; they could always make him forget. He had half a mind to get up and just leave, but despite all of his negative feelings, 2D still found himself captivated by Amelie. Every time he looked at her, his stomach fluttered and his heart ached. Watching her now as she laughed at one of Simon’s stories, she did look genuinely happy. At least that was one good thing about all of this. 2D just wanted what was best for Amelie in the end; he just hoped that it would have been him that was the best for her.

               A short while later, Simon got to his feet and kissed Amelie goodbye. “I’ve got to go on patrol,” he said. Giving 2D a firm handshake, he made his way back into the city. Amelie watched him go and when he was indiscernible from the darkness, she turned back to 2D and let out a half-sigh, half-giggle. “So,” she started, getting up to sit next to him, “what do you think? Isn’t Simon great?”

               That jealous monster reared its ugly head. It told 2D to tell Amelie what he really thought about Simon, it wanted to roar and bite Simon’s head off, to capture Amelie and devour her heart slowly with all of 2D’s unspoken feelings, but he merely swallowed those words and grimaced. “Yeah, he’s nice,” was his quiet response. He did his best to keep still while sitting next to her. Part of him wanted nothing to do with Amelie; starve the senses, out of sight, out of mind, that sort of thing. The other part of him wanted to wrap his arms around her and kiss her like there would be no tomorrow. He wasn’t sure what to do here.

               She sighed, “You know, after we graduated, we talked about getting married…” 2D’s insides clenched with the force of a black hole; why was she telling him these things? “It’s a crazy thing, that we got this second chance. It’s weirdly… good to see him again. It feels…like he never left.” He was digging his nails into his pant legs so hard he could feel the biting pain on his skin.

               Ten, tortuous minutes later, Adeline came jogging out from behind some buildings. Her face was stony. “There you are,” she addressed her sister. She quickly walked up to Amelie, perplexing her by wrapping her up in tight hug. When she pulled away, she messily swept the hair out of the way and grabbed her face with both hands. “I need you to come with me, but before we go, I need you to know that I’m so sorry. I wanted to tell you before, but I thought if he left, we’d never have to see his face again.”

               Amelie gently pulled Adeline’s hands away. “What are you talking about?” she half laughed, looking to 2D for a clue, who shrugged, just as confused. Her sister pursed her lips, conflicted, then grabbed her hand and pulled her to her feet.

               “Just come.”

               Adeline dragged her sister through the alleyways, 2D following suit. They came to a stop outside of an abandoned house. It sat on the outermost edge of the residential area, on the corner of the street, all by itself. The windows were boarded up, and the door was shut, but all three of them could hear noise coming from inside. It was clear what was going on in there.

               Amelie scoffed and looked at her sister. “What’s this? You dragged me here to listen to two people have sex?” Adeline said nothing, her brows scrunched together. “What, are we gonna do that thing we did as kids, where we knock on the door and run away?”

               Her sister weakly gestured toward the door. “Just… just open the door.” Making a face and rolling her eyes, Amelie threw her arms up, walked up to the house and swung the door open.

               Inside was a small room, a kitchen by the looks of the abandoned appliances. There was a wooden table in the center, and some chairs thrown haphazardly into the far corner. The room was inexcusably dark, save for a single, old fashioned lamp sitting on the counter by the stove. Here was the source of the noise. A man and a woman were having sex; she was bent over the table, and he was standing over her, ramming his hips into her, creating the crude noise of moist skin slapping together and drawing choppy moans from her.

               Amelie stood there, taking in the scene. At first she felt embarrassed for having listened to her sister, to interrupt these people in their moment of passion. As the light adjusted on her eyes, it became clear that the man was Simon and he was balls deep inside of another woman. When they both noticed they had company, he jumped away from her like he had just received a shock directly to the dick. They did their best to cover their nudity but their clothes were on the other side of the room.

               “A-Amelie, what are you doing here, love?”

               She didn’t say a word; she only looked him straight in the face, wide-eyed. Exhaling heavily from the nose, she closed the door with a slam and began to walk away, strangely calm. She’d go anywhere to get away from this. Simon swung the door open, running out and struggling to get his pants up his legs.

               “Darling, wait!” He grabbed her arm and turned her around. “It’s not what it looks like.” That’s what they always said. Amelie still had that deer-in-the-headlights look. He managed to keep her still for a second, but she snapped out of it, yanked her arm from his grip, and stormed off. He tried to go after her, but before he could proceed more than a few hops, he was knocked off his feet by a swift right hook from Adeline.

               She stood over him, shaking the pain from her knuckles, chest heaving from the adrenaline of an impulsive, violent act. “I told you to stay away from her when I caught you in school. You didn’t listen. Take this as your last warning.” Her face was thunderous.

               Pants around his knees, cheek bruising, and face covered in dirt, Simon, completely humiliated, looked up at her and at 2D. He had no words to say, but at least had the decency to look down in shame. Adeline stomped away to look for her sister. 2D stayed a few more seconds to look down at Simon. His petty reasons to hate him seemed to have footing now, and in a way, he was satisfied to see him crash and burn like this, but it cost Amelie a broken heart. And 2D hated Simon more for that. It was Murdoc and Paula all over again.

               Before he gave chase to find his friends, 2D knelt down by Simon. He tapped him gently on his face to make him look up, hoping the man before him could see his pathetic reflection in his own dark eyes and said very softly, “You never deserved her anyway.”

 

               Throughout the week, it had been evident that Simon would not leave Amelie alone, often trying to corner her, perhaps in an attempt to explain himself, or win her back. Adeline and 2D agreed that they would not give him that opportunity. In the most discreet way as possible, one or both of them were always with her, and when they saw Simon lurking around, they pointedly changed paths or tasks to quickly walk out of a disastrous confrontation.

               It was annoying work, but they managed it for a while; Simon was a dirt bag, but he was persistent. One night, after a long week of avoiding him, Amelie had turned in early. She had been quiet and sullen these days, and it was painful to see her like that. Adeline and 2D sat together by the fire outside of their neighboring tents. They were enjoying a well-deserved, rare cup of tea, rationed out months ago, but they had managed to save it for when it was needed. Adeline put her mug down by her feet and looped her arms under 2D’s. He froze, clearly uncomfortable. She often did things like this, in front of other people, in front of Amelie. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t used to it, but that didn’t make things any less awkward for him. He cleared his throat in an attempt to bring attention to that fact and gently pulled his arm away. To make it all seem a bit more natural he turned to Adeline and ask, “S-So, I never got a chance to ask you. That night, when you _amazingly_ punched that tosser, you had given him a ‘last warning’, and said something about telling him to stay away. What was all that?”

               Slowly, Adeline straightened up and crossed her legs. “Well… as I’m sure you’ve gathered, but they dated since grade eleven. He was okay back then, probably because I didn’t know much about him.” As she talked, she began to become irate, making fists on her knees, clutching at the fabric of her pants. “Amelie was so blind. A week before their graduation, I found him fucking some girl in the cleaning closet. He begged me not tell her; said he loved her and didn’t want to hurt her. I guess I was blind back then too, because I agreed not to tell her. I made him promise to break up with her when they graduate. He refused, said she’d be suspicious with it being so sudden, so I told him to tell Amelie that he enlisted in the Army, and that he’d have to leave immediately.”

               2D’s jaw clenched. “So he was never actually enlisted. He just lied to her about it.”

               “Yes.”  Adeline’s nostrils were flaring now. “Just our luck though; seems that bastard either got drafted, or he really did enlist, and he crossed paths with us here.”

               He let out a frustrated huff. He felt like he already went over those words, except that now they were coming back and kicking him hard in the ass. 2D was so absorbed in his own irritated thoughts that he barely registered Adeline creeping under his arm again. When she rested her head on his shoulder, he realized that she was doing _it_ again. She let out a sigh and seemed so content that 2D decided he’d let this one go. He still cared about her, after all. With a slight feeling that it might not be the best move for his true feelings, he gave her a soft kiss on the tip of her forehead and rested his cheek against her head. She softly stroked his arm, and he had to admit, it did all feel very nice.

               After a while, their campfire had died down to embers. Adeline stretched and pecked 2D’s cheek, wishing him a good night before climbing into the tent with her sister. As he watched her go, he caught a glimpse of Amelie, lying still in her bedroll, back towards him. He was glad she was getting some sleep. After he found out about Paula and Murdoc, 2D couldn’t catch a good night’s rest for a while; his grief and anger kept him tossing and turning all night. Sometimes he’d be able to sleep for a few hours if he cried himself empty, but he always woke up feeling horrible the morning after.

               By this time now, most everyone had gone to bed, save for the soldiers on patrol. 2D considered going to sleep as well, but he wasn’t too tired yet. He instead stretched his legs out in front of him and leaned back on his hands, head thrown back to watch the stars. The sky was incredibly clear. There were no tall skyscrapers or light pollution to block the stars here. Sometimes a cool breeze would pass through, and it smelled like the sea (they must have been near a shore). It reminded him so much of his days on Plastic Beach. Aside from being held prisoner, and everything that happened, it was rather nice to be there, where Murdoc left him mostly alone.

               2D enjoyed thirty blissful minutes, lost in thought, before he heard the fabric of the sisters’ tent open. Adeline must not be able to sleep. When she came to sit by him, he asked her if that was so.

               “No, Adeline’s fast asleep,” Amelie replied, her voice sultry and raspy from hours of disuse.

               He sat up, surprised to see her. “Oh,” he replied lamely. He had thought Amelie would sleep through the night. Even though sleep never came easy for 2D, he understood that grief and heartache could pull you into a deep sleep. But most times it kept you up, torturing you. He had hoped that if she was sad, it would be the other kind of sadness at least. “I—What are you doing up then?”

               Amelie shrugged. “I couldn’t sleep. I hope you don’t mind if I join you.”

               “Y-Yeah, ‘course you can!” He felt his stomach twist in knots.

               They sat in silence for a few minutes, staring up at the bright stars. There was half a moon tonight, and it shone dimly down on them. The chirping of crickets and cicadas were like a melancholic song, being sung just for their ears and 2D was acutely aware that his fingers were just centimeters away from Amelie’s. His heart was ramming into his ribs and he felt like he could punch himself in the face. Here she was, the fancy of his affections, hurting and lost, and all he could think of was holding her hand and taking her in his arms to fulfill his own emotions. She did look rather beautiful in this way, with the silver light caught in her black hair, and the stars reflecting in her solemn eyes, looking like dark galaxies.

               As if she could hear his thoughts, Amelie closed them, capturing the stars there in her irises. She took a deep breath in and slowly lowered herself to the ground. She laid there with one arm supporting her head, the other hand draped carelessly across the ground between them. “Stu,” she muttered after a while, “Aren’t you tired?”

               Hesitantly, he lay down next to her. “”Course I am. I’m just not ready to give up this view yet.” 2D was looking at her when he said it, but he was sure she thought he meant the night sky. “Aren’t you tired?”

               “…Yeah, but I’m not ready to go back.”

               Not long after that, he heard her soft, deep breathing. She had fallen asleep. He watched her for a while, the way her chest rose and fell with each breath, and how she looked so at peace this way. He smiled and reached for her hand that lay between them, hesitated for a moment, and then gently weaved his fingers between hers. The feeling was thrilling. The longer he lay there, the more he thought about how he should just let go, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He wanted to hold on forever.

               Eventually, he too fell asleep, holding her hand, and dreamed the sweetest of dreams, the best he’d had in a long time. 2D regretted waking up, and when he did he felt even more regret. Amelie was gone, and with embarrassing comprehension, he realized he might have held her hand all through the night. He just hoped he had let go by the time she got up.

* * *

 

               Neither of them talked about that night, so 2D assumed that he had lucked out, and Amelie never knew that he held her hand at all. She never came back out after going to bed a first time, even though he made sure to stay up extra late. Eventually he gave it up and just went to bed when everyone else did. He’d just have to treasure that private moment for as long as he could remember it. Even though he had to let go of Amelie’s hand that night, he’d never let go of the memory.

               As things fell back into a regular pattern, and things seemed peaceful, 2D found himself one evening following the sisters back to their tents, all of them with food bowls in hand, ready for dinner. Adeline and Amelie walked ahead of him animatedly debating something. Amelie was smiling and laughing and looked happy, and Adeline was glad to see her that way. They kept the conversation light and boisterous, and everything seemed so normal watching them.

               But the merriment was interrupted by a loud crash that shook the earth beneath them. They all whipped around to look behind them where a fiery crater had taken out the food line, where more than a dozen soldiers had stood, mere seconds ago. Amelie was the first one to snap back to her senses. She dropped her bowl and grabbed Adeline’s hand, yanking her forward. 2D followed suit, eyes turned up to the sky burning with the light of the sunset in front of him, and the fires and falling mortars behind him.

               They reached their tents and Amelie snatched up their rifles. Stupidly, they had all let their guards down and gotten into the habit of only carrying a pistol on their person. Everywhere around them, soldiers were running and ducking for cover and searching for weapons. If there was screaming, it couldn’t be heard over the sound of shells crashing into the ground.

               2D looked around; there was nowhere solid to duck for cover. They had no fortified bases, and the buildings that stood around them, crumbled to pieces as more rockets bulldozed through them, some even exploding on impact, sending huge sections of debris falling into the crowd below.

               “We have to get out of the city!!” Amelie shouted. They picked a direction and began to run. It didn’t matter where they ended up, 2D thought, they just needed to survive the attack right now. He didn’t want to end up like all those people he had seen suffering and burning alive in their first witnessed mortar attack. They ran through smoke screens and dusty fogs created by explosions. After a while, they stopped running into other people and it felt like a horrible nightmare running through the empty streets as the city fell apart around them.

               “There! We’re almost there!” Adeline pointed straight ahead at the dark line of trees, not more than half a mile out. But just as the words left her mouth, her eyes darted up and she turned, pushing Amelie backwards as hard as she could into 2D, who was sprinting behind them. There was an explosion just five hundred feet in the direction that they were running, and the force of the shell dropping threw them all back.

               2D sat up as best he could, entire body aching from the whiplash and the pain of impact on the hard ground. Dust was slowly settling on top of them all, filling their mouths and invading their eyes. Amelie was near him, coughing and getting to her feet as well. They both cautiously approached the new, smoking crater that filled the road. Night had fallen and filled the bottom with vast darkness that not even the fires around them could illuminate.

               Suddenly realizing that there were only two of them, Amelie gasped. “Adeline!!” She looked around frantically and sprinted back to where they had fallen, but her sister wasn’t there. She went further down the road, straining her eyes against the darkness, screaming her name, but there was no, “I’m here!” After an agonizingly long minute of shouting and searching, there was a weak cough. They found Adeline not far from where they were thrown, covered by some large pieces of the road that had been haphazardly tossed from the mortar. As if with superhuman strength, Amelie ran to the sound and pushed the concrete away like it weighed nothing. 2D trotted forward, but as he came close, he saw how Amelie’s shoulders sagged.

               The strap of her rifle slipped off of her and the gun clattered to the ground as she dropped to her knees. He came to stand over her and saw, by the dim light of the burning city behind them, Adeline’s crushed body. Whether it was the debris or the initial explosion that had shredded her, they would never know, but she lay in a growing pool of red, legs mangled, one arm twisted at an impossible angle. Blood dribbled at a steady pace from the corner of her mouth, from both nostrils, and had filled one of her eyes, reminding 2D of his own 8-Ball fractures.

               Adeline turned a strained face up to Amelie and in a strangled voice, she muttered, “You… you have to go.”

               Amelie shook her head vigorously. “I’m not leaving you. Stuart, help me—“

               “No!” Adeline coughed, blood splattering onto her chin and into her sister’s face. “You need to leave. Get somewhere safe, and come back for me later.”

               “Don’t be stupid! I’m not leaving you here!” Amelie began to move forward in an attempt to gather her sister into her arms, but she slapped her hands away with her one good hand. Amelie pinned it to her side and began to pick her up. Adeline cried in pain, as if all of her bones were shattered. They probably were.

               None of them had noticed that the shelling had stopped. None of them noticed the ragtag band of shooters headed toward them until they were shouting obscenities at them. In the panic, 2D crouched down and began to help Amelie pull up her sister, but Adeline yelled out in pain again and pushed them both off.

               “Get the fuck out of here! They’re coming! You’ll die if you stay!” Amelie began to protest, but Adeline cut her off again, voice gurgling through the blood, “I’m going to die here! But you can survive! You can go home, Amelie!”

               Through streaming tears, Amelie shouted back, “I’m not going home without you! If you die here, then I’ll die with you!” She turned and snatched up her rifle, turning toward the crowd of gunners headed toward them. They were closer now, and they opened fire, bullets ricocheting everywhere around the trio. 2D ducked, and did his best to hide Adeline from the stray shots. He looked up at Amelie, who was standing her ground, shouting at the top of her lungs, gun rattling, ammunition shells raining from her rifle like a metal storm.

               In the midst of the chaos, a hand reached up and grabbed him by the shoulder. Adeline’s resolve had broken now, and she was crying. “Get my sister to safety!” And through the blood and tears streaking her face, she gave 2D one last, passionate kiss, painting his mouth red before roughly pushing him away.

               “We can get you out of here!” 2D protested.

               Adeline just shook her head bitterly. “You can’t.”

               At the sound of painful shrieking, they both looked up to see Amelie collapse, blood staining both legs of her pants; she had been shot. 2D tried to grab for Amelie, but she pushed his hands away and half collapsed, half crawled toward her sister, wrapping her arms tightly around her neck. They sobbed into each other’s shoulders, and Amelie begged her sister to let them take her with them. Adeline pushed Amelie away at that and 2D grabbed her by the shoulders. She wouldn’t let go. He gave a powerful yank at her shirt, and she made one last mad grab for her sister, snatching off her ID discs.

               “GO!” Adeline had urged him on as, in what would later be a blur to him, he scooped up Amelie in both arms and began to run for the trees. Bullets flew all around him, whizzing painfully close to his ears. He remembered that Amelie protested and kicked and hit him, crying for him to let her go, and he remembered the sisters’ shrill cries, calling for each other as he ripped them apart. He couldn’t remember if the people had chased after them, or if they had stayed to slay Adeline, but he knew he regretted leaving her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god, I'm so sorry. This was so hard to write. I'm sorry.


	8. Hoping For Words

When 2D came to, he was wildly confused as to where he was. The last thing he remembered was running towards the trees with Amelie fighting him in his arms. He recalled her screaming and gunfire and he remembered pain blossoming across his back. As he awoke, his chest and stomach were stiff while trying to sit up, and his muscles burned with internal fire, forcing him to choke and struggle for air. After half a minute, he was able to take a deep breath and sunk back into his pillow. With the colours and sounds finally registering with him, he realized he was surrounded by other beds.

The large room was dark, with a tiny flashing light at the other end; someone was sitting behind a small television with the volume turned down low. The window behind them told him it was nighttime. With a pained grunt, 2D managed to push himself up into a sitting position with one arm and looked around. He was surrounded by hospital beds; most were occupied. The one on his left was empty, the sheets freshly made, waiting for the next patient. The one on his right had the curtain drawn so he couldn’t see who was on the other side.

The person behind the TV noticed him and got up to approach him with a clipboard. “Morning, Sleeping Beauty,” the man said, despite it being the middle of the night. “Do you know where you are?”

2D looked around. His head felt fuzzy, but he was definitely sure of where he was. “Hospital,” was his reply. His voice cracked from disuse.

The man marked something down on his clipboard before putting it down and pulling out a small flashlight. He grabbed 2D’s face and forced open his eyelids, shining the light in each of his pupils to check the reaction. “Do you know why you’re here?” The singer shook his head as best he could while still being held. The man pulled away and then wrote more down on his clipboard. “You were shot. Twice.”

“W-What??”

“Once through the shoulder, just under your left collar bone, and just outside of your right rib cage. Lucky for you, both bullets missed vital organs. The one by your ribs tore right through your skinny ass, but your shoulder blade caught the other. Surgeons got it out though.” He spoke nonchalantly, writing more down before looking up at 2D again.

“W…When?” 2D asked shakily, gripping his bound shoulder where the bullet wound was. It was then that he really registered that his left arm was in a sling, bound to his body by a harness.

“Think they said it was when you ran for cover in the trees. Bastards caught you just before you made it and you fell like a ton of bricks. Crushed your friend and smacked your head when you went down. Luckily—“

“Wait! Where is she? Where’s Amelie!?” 2D’s torso tensed and burned with pain. He winced but breathed through it. “Please. Is she okay?”

The man took a moment before writing something else down. “Luckily, you didn’t get a concussion from that and—“

“Look, I don’t care about that! Please, tell me where is Amelie? Did…Did Adeline make it?” He felt his eyes sting with welling tears at that last part. He hoped it was all a terrible nightmare.

The attendant huffed through his nose, and pushed through what he was saying before. “—And the surgeons got that round out of your shoulder in no time. Now, if you want to see the bullet that got you—“ The clipboard and pen he was holding were slapped out of his hands. He watched silently on as 2D writhed in pain from that; served him right. The man crossed his arms and waited a bit before saying, “Are you going to let me finish?”

Fighting through the pain for breath, 2D clenched his teeth and grunted out, “Please just tell me where they are.” His cheeks were wet with tears.

The man looked at him for a long moment before bending to pick up his things. “The one you were carrying away got shot in both legs four times. She was still conscious and trying to get to her feet when reinforcement arrived; went straight to the medical tent when they brought her back to undergo surgery.”

2D swallowed thickly. Shot four times in the legs and underwent surgery. He hoped that the man wouldn’t say that she had to have them amputated, but he stopped there. “What about Adeline?” 2D dared to ask, voice shaking. “Did she make it? Did anyone go back for her?”

His nurse looked pitifully down at him and 2D knew then. “She was dead when the firefight ceased. We brought back the body, but there was nothing to be done. I’m sorry.”

His heart crumbled coldly, and hot tears fell in thick streams as 2D heard that first bit. Everything after that was a high pitched whine. The attending nurse turned and left after giving his leg a sympathetic pat. Openly sobbing, 2D shook with grief. He gripped his sheets, something to support him through his horror. Soon, his front was soaked with tears, and maybe some snot; his emotions were pouring out through his face but he didn’t have the strength to wipe it up. All that he had in him was used to cry and hold his weakened self together as he trembled with pain, both physical and emotional.

He sat there, weeping for a long while until he no longer had the strength to hold himself up. He fell back into his pillow, writhing in agony right afterwards, having forgotten that he was recovering from being shot twice. 2D lay there until the sun rose, his eyes dry but puffy, and his brain aching from crying so hard. The sun began to rise, painting the sky red and orange through the windows of the building and patients and medical staff rose with it.

“Breakfast!” a nurse called. Most of the patients around him were already getting out of bed, but they began to file towards the tables in the other room when the food was served. The other, bed-ridden soldiers had bowls of oatmeal and plates of eggs brought to them. Many of them were covered head-to-toe in fresh and bloody bandages, sporting casts, or the worst of them all, were missing limbs.

To 2D’s right, the bed beside him had their curtains pulled open on the other side, so he still couldn’t see who was there. “Time to eat,” came the voice of the nurse who had delivered him the bad news in the night. Silence met his words; there wasn’t even the clinking of utensil on the metal of the bowl. “C’mon,” the nurse urged, “you have to eat.”

“….I don’t want to eat,” a low, raspy voice eventually answered.

A sigh followed that. “Take the bowl. You can eat it when you’re ready.” The sounds of a curtain being drawn again came soon after, and the man came round the other side, catching 2D’s eye. He had a metal bowl in his hand, which he offered to the singer. “Breakfast,” he said, wearily.

2D sat up, with some trouble, and took it with a quiet thanks. As the nurse began to walk away, 2D called him back. “Can you tell me? Who’s behind the curtain, I mean.”

The man looked at him for a long time with tired eyes, so long it felt, that 2D was a few seconds away from just redacting his comment. Eventually the nurse said, “It’s your friend.” He made a gesture, silently gesticulating if there were any more questions before walking away to end his shift.

Cradling the bowl of goopy oatmeal in his lap, 2D spooned a taste of the hot porridge into his mouth with his one good hand, glancing over at the curtain to his right, where he heard no sounds; no eating, no sighing, no crying. It was as if all noise ceased to exist beyond the drapes around her bed. He began to wonder if she was asleep.

* * *

 

The entire three weeks that 2D was at the military hospital, he never really got a chance to talk to Amelie. Eventually, she emerged from behind the curtains, but she never left the bed unassisted. She had been shot three times in her right thigh and once through her left shin. Both legs were in casts, so she wasn’t exactly mobile, even if she had wanted to get up. She hardly said a word to 2D, and sometimes at night, he could hear her sobbing quietly. Her crying sounded so down-trodden and broken hearted that it did something to 2D’s insides that he just couldn’t quite describe. Each evening, he’d sit by Amelie’s side, holding her hand and talked nonsense in the hopes to get her mind off of things, but the most she ever did was look him sadly in the eyes. He could see she was broken. Adeline’s death had snapped something in her.

The most that 2D had seen Amelie react during their time there was when Simon had come to visit one afternoon. He ignored 2D and sat on her bed, talking to her, talking about how he’d heard of her sister’s death and how he’d be there for her. He said he loved her and that he was sorry for what he had done, but he was there to support her now. The entire time, she had looked away from him, seemingly not even hearing him, but when he had said those last words, she turned in a snap and slapped him so hard that he practically fell off of the bed. The sound was so loud that people nearby had stopped what they were doing to see what had happened.

“Get out,” she had said, her voice ringing cold. Simon stared at her for a long minute, before silently gathering his things and slumping out of the room, trying and failing to hold his head high in whatever was left of his dignity.

Sometime after that, an officer stopped by to deliver her discharge papers. On her last day, Amelie grabbed 2D’s hand, gripping it tightly. She no longer cried, but her eyes were the saddest he’d ever seen. They exchanged no words, only sat there, holding hands. 2D didn’t dare to let go; for all he knew, this would be the last time he’d ever get the chance. He squeezed and caressed her fingers in an ill attempt to calm the nervous quelling in his heart. He committed every line of skin to mind and hoped his memory wouldn’t fail him, as it had so many times before. Eventually someone came to get her; she would be shipped home that day. Before she went, she asked for a paper and pen, wrote something down and slipped it into 2D’s fist.

“My parents’ home,” she murmured. “That’s where we’ll be holding…” Her throat clenched, preventing her from talking any more about what she wanted to say.

“…Where I’ll go to see Adeline…?” 2D finished for her, grabbing her hand again. Amelie nodded, solemnly. After that, her attending nurse bridal lifted her out of bed and placed her in a wheelchair. Amelie looked over her shoulder at 2D, eyes wide, expression frightened, lost. 2D held her gaze, watching with a heavy heart as the nurse wheeled her out of the building to finally go home.

When she was out of sight, 2D looked down at the note, crumpled in his clammy hands. Her parents’ home address was in France. There was no date or time for Adeline’s funeral, but he was sure that he would miss it anyway, as he wasn’t sure when he’d be dismissed; all he could do was hope.

* * *

 

In a month’s time, 2D was home with his parents in Crawley and his arm was out of a sling, but his body was still incredibly tender. It was good to see his mum and dad, but it was also strange. Sometimes he expected to look in the mirror and see two regular eyes staring back at him again, and his messy azure locks swept to the side in a boyish manner. 2D considered trying to find the band, but if he was being quite honest, he wasn’t in the mood to get back to Gorillaz right away.

He spent his days going to physical therapy (it wasn’t a requirement, but more like a check up on his occupational skills), and plinking meaningless tunes on the keyboard he had used as a teen living at home; he couldn’t even muster the energy to remember the music he had shared with Adeline during one of their brainstorming sessions. After four and a half weeks of this, he was sitting down to dinner with parents. They engaged in small talk as they ate, and casually, as if it was nothing, his mum said out of nowhere, “Son, are you going to visit your friend?”

He gulped down his half chewed shepherd’s pie, spluttered and finally managed, “What do you mean?”

“That lovely girl in the photo you have upstairs. The one you talked to your mother about in secret,” 2D’s father said with a mouth full of mash, pretending not to notice the glare his wife shot his way, “As if you thought she wouldn’t tell me. You seem to write her a lot.”

It was true; 2D had a picture of Amelie tucked into the frame of the mirror of his desk vanity. It was obviously during their tour together. He stood in the middle, between a grinning Adeline throwing up a peace sign and a smirking Amelie. He had both arms around them and they stood in front of a group of people, some of whom were making silly faces at the camera in the background. It was the only picture he had of them. To accompany it, he had other pictures tucked and framed. Pictures of just his parents, of a younger him on some vacation with them, high school buds, one of a ten-year-old Noodle, a couple of him and Russel arm-in-arm, and one of Gorillaz, the first one of all four of them together as a band.

On his desk, he had paper and pencils strewn about. Some of them were lyric sheets in progress, some were sheet music, both filled and blank, but most of them were letters he had written, or were writing. They were all to Amelie. He wanted to send word to her, but he just wasn’t sure what to say. His waste paper basket was full of crumpled up letters as well. There was just so much he wanted to say, but so many wrong ways to say it all.

Ignoring his embarrassment, and annoyance at his mother, 2D slouched in his chair, spoon clinking on his dish. “I dunno,” he muttered. He wanted to see Amelie, of course, but what would he say to her? She looked so broken the last time he saw her. He just wasn’t good with dealing with personal loss.

“Ever sent her one of those letters?” His mum put her hand gently on his idle one with a sympathetic look. “It seems like you miss her a lot.” So she had read some, or maybe all, of them. He couldn’t be mad; he knew his mum was a naturally curious person. And anyway, he wasn’t in secondary school anymore, where he acted like a typical teenager and pretended his parents didn’t need to know about his love life. He was an adult now, a rock star, and he’d certainly done much worse than like-like a girl.

“No… none of them sound right.”

There was silence for a moment before his dad spoke up again. “There are no better words than the ones that come to you in the moment. You can take my car tomorrow. Take the ferry across the channel and go see her.”

* * *

 

In the morning, 2D had breakfast with his dad (as his mum worked a morning shift). “Dad, I dunno if I’m ready to see her. What do I say? What _should_ I say?? What if she needs comfort??? How do you comfort someone?!” His voice squeaked in trepidation. _Why in the world was he so nervous_?

Setting his tea cup down, his father put a hand on his shoulder. “There’s no use worrying about it right now. You’re a nice boy, and you seem to care a good deal about this young lady. Just stay calm, and it will come naturally.

During the ferry ride across the channel, 2D sat in the car, knee bouncing, throat clenching, nails being chewed. Should he get flowers? Yes, that would be smart, but which ones? He phoned his mum and asked her for her input. When they landed, he stopped at a local flower shop in a city by the shore and picked up a bouquet of white calla lilies and then finally set down the road to meet Amelie at her parents’.

Their house was on the outskirts of Tours; it was charming and quaint. When he knocked on the door, a peppered Asian man, though looking no older than forty-five, answered. 2D presented himself as their daughters’ friend and they shook hands. As he was invited inside, a similarly aged Asian woman came down the hallway. He introduced himself properly to both parents and handed the armful of flowers to Amelie’s mother. They introduced themselves as Sergio and Celine.

They accepted his gracious condolences and took a brief moment to remember their late daughter. Celine sobbed quietly before getting ahold of her emotions and excusing herself from the room to tend to the flowers.

“I’m sorry you had to see my wife cry, “ Sergio said. “We’re still very raw from our dear Adeline’s passing.”

It took everything in 2D to keep himself from crying as well. Just the name was enough to hurt him. “I understand,” he murmured quietly, voice quivering with emotion. “I’m sure we are all still very shocked.”

There was a minute of silence between them as they took the time to recall their own memories of Adeline, but after the moment, Sergio stood and cleared his throat. “Would you like to visit with Amelie?”

In a haze of disbelief, 2D nodded eagerly. He joined the man down the hall to a door at the back of the house.

“She’s just outside in the yard.”

As Sergio left, 2D took a deep breath to settle his heart and the butterflies in his stomach. He opened the door and stepped out.

It was a nice day, good weather to transition from the hot summer days to the chilly autumn ones. The sky was bright and clouds floated serenely above, caught in the same breeze that whispered gently across 2D’s nose. The yard was small and cosy and beautifully simple. Perfectly manicured red rose bushes huddled up against the side of the house, bordered by a line of bright yellow daffodils. The stone path cut across grass so green and lush that looked soft enough to lie down on. On his right sat a simple round table, surrounded by four matching chairs; a pergola stained red stood over it, giving the outside sitting area a classy touch. Swaying nearby was a cheerful tree, providing shade for the lonely figure sitting underneath it on a bench pressed against the fence behind it. _There she was_.

“Amelie!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long to put out another chapter. Enjoy!


	9. Hoping for A Visit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's another passing chapter, but I want to be able to establish the relationship between Amelie and 2D in their current circumstance as much as possible.

               Amelie looked so small, sitting there under the tree by herself. She didn’t look around when 2D called her name; she looked so lost in thought, staring up at the leaves with distant eyes. The sun shined through them, leaving patches of shimmering light across her face. In this way, in that airy dress she wore, she looked so pale and thin, like she wasn’t in the best of health. Admittedly, this was the first time 2D had seen her in something other than army fatigues, so perhaps this was how she always looked; except that there was something neglectful looking about how her cheeks seemed just a little sunken. Her hair had gotten longer as well; even the half that she had shaved was long enough to bend to the gravity of its own weight.

               2D closed the distance between them and as he neared, Amelie’s eyes drifted from the leaves above her to his face, staring at him dreamily before snapping out of her reverie. “Stuart,” she murmured, mildly surprised.

               “Amelie,” he whispered, the breath almost taken from him by her gaze. He cleared his throat before asking, “M-May I sit with you?” She patted the spot next to her on the bench, and he took the seat hesitantly.

               There were a few moments of silence between them as they sat together. 2D felt it was awkward as he sat there with his hands on his knees. The few glances he dared to steal towards Amelie told him she didn’t seem to feel the same way about it. After a while, she slipped her hand on top of his and murmured, “It’s good to see you.” Her voice was as low and hoarse as it was when he last heard it in the army hospital.

               “Yeah… I came because I—“ His throat was drying up. The singer swallowed hard and tried again. “Because I wanted to see you, and… and visit Adeline.” Amelie said nothing, but he dared not look at her reaction. Her hand remained on his, limp and frail looking. “I’ve missed you both.”

               “I’m sure she would’ve missed you too.” Her reply was not what he was hoping to hear.

               “And you?”

               Amelie took her time answering, as if she was seriously considering the weight of her next words. What was she considering? “Yeah, I’ve missed you too.” Somehow this answer stung more than her first one. Just the way she said it, it was as if she didn’t care that he was there. The gentle squeeze she gave his hand, and how she looped her fingers in his loose fist lessened the bitterness a little though.

               “Come, let’s get tea. Then I’ll take you to see Adeline.” Amelie pulled her hand from 2D’s, and went straight for the cane, sitting on her side of the bench. He was so surprised as he watched her struggle to stand, that it didn’t occur to him to help her up until she was already on her feet.

               “Amelie, wait. You’re on a cane??”

               Like all of her words today, she hesitated before she spoke, she didn’t even look up at him. “I’m learning to walk again.”

               It felt like 2D was struck in the head with that cane of hers. “What do you mean, ‘learning’? Did something happen?!”

               “I got shot in the legs, Stuart, four times, and crawled around as my sister was dying!” Her temper snapped in an instant. Clearly 2D had somehow hashed open a fresh wound. Amelie saw the look of hurt shock on his face and pursed her lips together in immediate regret. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you.” She slowly sat back down, and after a moment, 2D rejoined her. “After I got discharged, I went to physical therapy, as a precaution to make sure I hadn’t sustained any further muscular damage.” Amelie’s words came out uncertainly, as if she didn’t want to talk about this. “On the first day, they asked me to stand out of my wheelchair, and when I did, somehow the tendon on my left leg separated from the ankle. I had emergency surgery to have it reattached and went back to physical therapy, this time to learn to walk properly… They predict that’s about all I’ll be able to do from now on.”

               2D tilted his head in confusion. “What do you mean? You won’t be able to run anymore?”

               Amelie exhaled dejectedly. “It means I… I won’t be able to dance anymore.”

               “I—“ At first, he wasn’t sure what to say, until in a rush of memories, he recalled a brief conversation with Adeline while she stayed on base camp during her injury.

_“When the war is over, I want to see my sister dance again. I know she’ll be happy; it’s her life’s passion. You should come see Amelie in her element one day, if you can. It’s enchanting.”_

               Adeline had suggested that he go to one of her concerts when they were able to go home. Back then, they were all confident that they’d all make it home together, so they had made plans to go; he had promised to make a day of it. But with everything that had happened, Adeline gone, her sister’s legs the way they were, he would never be able to fulfill his promise, and Amelie might never be able to pursue her passion again.

               2D, speechless, just looked on as Amelie avoided his eyes, full of sorrow for her; she probably didn’t want to see his sympathy. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t find the right words to say. She looked so lost and so far away from him, sitting there, just mere centimeters away. She was unreachable to him. Then, in the midst of a beautiful sunny day, Amelie, who seemed so alone in a dark fog, began to weep. Tears pooled at her eyes, catching in her lashes before gliding down her face in heavy streams. 2D could see her jaw clenching, throat tight, trying to keep it together, but it was a fruitless effort. Her emotional gate broke and she crumbled into her own hands. Her thin shoulders shook with a few strangled sobs as she pushed her palms to her eyes, trying to catch her own tears.

               He should do something, he knew. 2D knew he had to comfort her somehow. As she tried to gather herself, she trembled with overwhelming emotion. He could see she was trying her best, but the dam had broken. She needed someone now more than ever.

               In a hesitant move, 2D tried to wrap his arms around Amelie. He wasn’t sure if this was the right thing to do; he was terrible at this sort of thing. He hated to see her so broken, but if she needed to cry, he wanted to be her shoulder. But before he could get himself completely around her, she had pushed his arms away. It seemed that his awkward attempt at comfort was what she needed to gather her emotions. They sat there, perhaps too close, as she hurriedly wiped at her face with the ends of her dress. Her face was stony as she apologized. She was simply tired, she clarified. But 2D shook his head.

               “…You don’t have to apologize or explain.” He wanted to say that she had every right to cry it all out, that perhaps she needed it. But maybe it wasn’t his place to say. It felt like she was pushing him away and it hurt. If that’s what it was, he didn’t want to create more distance by stepping in where he wasn’t welcome. Instead, he grabbed her hand, the way he did every day at the hospital, with their palms pressed together, and their fingers entwined. “I…” He was getting nervous again. “’M here for you… if you ever need someone, ‘M here for you, y’know.” 2D wanted to say “if you need _me_ ,” instead, because he didn’t want to be just “ _someone_ ,” but right then didn’t feel like the right time.

               Amelie didn’t pull her hand away from his like he had expected. She gripped it tighter instead, and 2D took that as a good sign. “I know.”

               After a long moment, she looked up at him. “Let’s get some tea, and catch up. Then we can… we can go see Adeline.”

* * *

 

               They took tea in the garden and for the most part it seemed rather pleasant. Amelie apologized for causing a scene but 2D insisted that she wasn’t in the wrong. After that, they discussed what they had been doing since being discharged. He talked about coming home to his parents, visiting with relatives and trying to write new songs. He said he wasn’t in a rush to get back to Gorillaz any time soon, but she reminded him that his bandmates, and the world of fans, might be sorely missing him. Amelie didn’t have much to say about what she’d been up to after coming home, and he didn’t press it.

               After their cups emptied, they headed back into the house. 2D headed towards the front, grabbing is keys to get ready for a drive, but instead of directing them to the door, Amelie led him into a bedroom down the hall from the entrance. Inside was a simple desk with some books stacked neatly to the side whose spines were written in a different language. A long string of prayer beads lay on top of them. There was a standing lamp and a chair to accompany the desk and on the other side of the room was a tall, ornate shelf.

               It contained a few red candles, some burning pots filled with rice and burned incense stems, and a few plates of fresh fruit arranged in a pleasing manner. There was a thick singing bowl and a Chinese temple block, both sitting on their own red cushions and paired with their own mallets tucked neatly on their own tier. The bottom most sill housed a few sitting cushions and an old fashioned boom box while on the top was a large framed image of the Buddha, sitting cross-legged on a bloomed lotus, eyes closed in mediation. Below that were home pictures, photos meant for a family album. There were five of them in total; four were in black-and-white, or sepia; obviously Amelie’s grandparents from both sides. In the middle of them sat an in-colour still of Adeline, smiling and looking genuinely happy. Her hair was long, swept back behind her ears to show her bright eyes and high cheek bones better. These were images of the family’s deceased immediate relatives. 2D had seen this sort of prayer shrine when he would gather with some of his “Free Tibet” friends before a protest.

               2D was staring hard at the picture of Adeline. He’d never seen her like this, though he wished he could have. The war had robbed everyone of a lot of things. It robbed Amelie’s family of a daughter, a sister, and it robbed Adeline of her happy smile, and of her life.

               “Her cremation was the hardest thing to ever watch.” Amelie’s voice broke 2D out of his thoughts.

               When he turned to look at her, she looked like she was on the verge of crying again. The tears were practically spilling from her eyes already. He wanted so badly to hold her, but he didn’t want her to push him away again, so in the end, he stayed where he was, letting them both hurt.

               “She would’ve wanted you to come. To her funeral. She would’ve wanted to say goodbye to you.”

               “Amelie…” 2D’s throat clenched. Now he too, was about to weep. He knew he shouldn’t utter these next words, but he had to know. “Can you… can you tell me about it?”

               Now the tears did fall. She shook her head furiously. “I can’t…” Of course, she didn’t want to relive it.

               2D stood there quietly next to her as she wiped up her tears. He turned to look at the picture of Adeline again. She looked happy and peaceful; they chose a good picture. It reflected the sunny disposition he had known from her in the short time they had together. He hoped that wherever she was now, that she was feeling as she looked in that image.

               When Amelie had calmed down, 2D suggested they pray before leaving. The deep ringing of the singing bowl brought back memories of all the protests he’d sat through. They would play prayer songs that had the gong of a singing bowl and as soon as Amelie hit the bowl, he felt at peace. He prayed for Adeline, and for Amelie and her family, and he prayed that things would work out for them, for all of them, some day. He knew he couldn’t hope to see Adeline again, but he prayed that he would never lose Amelie, never see his life without her in it.

               They walked to the front door together to say their goodbyes. Amelie told him it was good to see him again, despite the circumstances. 2D told her he’d miss her. She hesitated at those words, but in the end, she reached out to grab his hand, and told him to visit her again soon. He promised he would, real soon.

               On the drive home, all he could think about was Amelie. Only thirty minutes apart and he was already missing her; he knew he would. Even through all the grief, he was still head over heels, love sick for her. His mother was home when he arrived back. She and his father asked how things went, and when he finished telling them about it, they shared a glance.

               “What? What is it?”

               2D’s father hesitated before grabbing a letter off of the nearby counter. “If you’re going to visit her again… you may want to make it _real soon_.” He handed the mail to him.

               The singer looked at his parents, confused, before looking down at what was given to him. It was a yellowing envelope. The writing on the surface was spikey and messy; the return address had no name; it was from a flat in London. The letter inside were only a few words, with no sender name, but 2D knew exactly who it was from:

               _“I know you’re there._

_Come back. It’s time to work.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be clear, they're Buddhist, if you're wondering about the prayer shrine.
> 
> I feel like there might be a lot of information unnecessary to the story, but it's very necessary to getting to know my characters.


	10. Hoping for A Goodbye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took the liberty of translating the French bits and just putting them in italics to indicate that it's another language.

               2D went to bed having read that letter over a dozen times. It was definitely from Murdoc. Somehow, that green goblin had gotten word of his return home and he wanted 2D to return to the band. But 2D wasn’t ready to go back just yet. He missed Noodle and Russel very much, but he just needed a little more time at home with his family and with Amelie before going back to work. He wanted time to properly say goodbye, because who knew when they’d see each other again?

               He spent an hour tossing and turning in bed. He used to fall asleep late very often, due to a hectic work, tour, and party schedule, but his time in the military had forced him to become familiar with a set and early sleeping habit. It was a weird luxury he had come to enjoy. When he glanced at the clock, it was well after one in the morning and he cursed himself. He turned his back to it and shut his eyes tight, hoping he would magically feel tired within the next few minutes, but when that didn’t work, he grabbed his phone off the night stand and stared at the lit screen for a bit before clicking his messaging app to stare at Amelie’s name. She had given him her number, telling him not to be a stranger. It was late, but it couldn’t hurt to send her his thoughts to read in the morning.

                              To Amelie:

                              01:25

_“hey when do you think I can see you again??”_

               He put his phone down… and then picked it right back up to review what he’d sent. It sounded desperate.

                              01:26

_“its just that I might have to go back to work soon and Id like to spend time with you before I go”_

                              01:26

_“I mean only if you want to of course”_

                              01:26

_“not that Im trying to sound clingy”_

                              01:26

_“which now I fear thats how im sounding”_

                              01:27

_“oh god im sounding desparate im so sorry just forget everything i said”_

                              01:27

_“if i could delete messages right now i would my god im so sorry”_

               2D tossed his phone on his bed and buried his face into his hands. Here he was, a mid-thirties man, feeling like an idiot teen again, only worse, seeing as he was actually smooth with girls when he was that age. He quietly cursed all his drinking; it killed his cool guy personality. He felt like he could slap himself a million times right now if it would make the embarrassment go away.  He was mid-writhe, when his phone dinged. If it weren’t for the screen lighting up, he might not have noticed, as he was groaning out his embarrassment and trying to gouge out his own eyes.

                              From Amelie:

                              01:32

                              _“Well I have PT midday tomorrow. If you want, we can have a late lunch.”_

               2D almost crushed his phone in excitement. He took a quick moment to get all his silent cheers out before taking a deep breath and texting back.

                              To Amelie:

                              01:34

                              _“lunch sounds great tomorrow! shall i pick you up at your parents?”_

From Amelie:

                              01:35

                              _“Sure. Come by at 14:30.”_

               He set his phone down, feeling giddy and nervous. He definitely wouldn’t be able to get to sleep tonight.

* * *

 

               2D woke thirty minutes before noon. He dressed in a pair of old, ripped jeans and a bomber jacket that barely fit, gulped down a bowl of cereal and asked his dad for the car keys. On the drive to the ferry stop, it all hit him. Crashing with his parents, dressing in (mostly) grunge fashion, begging for the car and getting butterflies over a girl; the nostalgia was almost too much. He felt like a kid again, and if he was being honest, it really felt nice to forget the stress of being a rock star. But he knew, as he entered France, that his time was limited. Murdoc was playing nice now, but if 2D didn’t come back on his own, that old goth would take things into his own hands soon.

               When he arrived at the house, he was early. He wasn’t sure if he should just wait in the car for the remainder of the time. Would that be too awkward? Considering the text conversation last night, perhaps another potential uncomfortable situation wouldn’t be best.

               Amelie’s mother, Cecile, answered the door. She looked pleasantly surprised to see him, and to his surprise, she gave 2D a huge, enveloping hug, one meant for close family or much loved friends. He had to bend double so she could wrap her arms around his neck. They sat in the front room with tea and pleasant conversation until Amelie finally returned home.

               She came in with her dad, cane in hand. It was still a foreign sight to him; the strong, athletic woman, who sprinted everywhere and was ahead of everyone else in morning drills, was limping, walking stiffly. Amelie looked at her mum and 2D spending time together with the most confused look on her face.

               “Uh… What’s going on here?”

               “Welcome home, _cherie_!” Cecile stood eagerly from the couch to go and greet her daughter and Sergio. “I was just getting to know your friend here better.”

               Amelie gave her a peculiar look. “What… for?”

               Cecile looked coyly at 2D, then back to her daughter and said in a quiet, conspiring voice. “ _He’s a very nice man. He’s a very nice man for you, wouldn’t you say?_ ”

               “ _Mama, non_! Oh, my god!”

               “ _I don’t appreciate this kind of talk about my daughter,_ ” Sergio cut in.

               “ _Sergio! She’s almost thirty! Don’t you want grandchildren_?”

               “Oh, my g— _Mama, Papa! Please stop! I’m standing right here!”_ Amelie pushed past her parents and stormed into her room, face flush with embarrassment.

               2D stayed where he stood, watching all of this in bewilderment. He had the weirdest feeling that they might be talking about him. As Amelie’s parents came to sit around the coffee table, he took his seat as well, trying not to feel awkward at all, hoping she would return very soon.

               Cecile refreshed his cup of tea. “So, 2D, you were talking about your band. It must be very exciting, the life of a musician!”

               He cleared his throat, trying to get pass that lump of nervousness. “Y-Yes, well it’s all quite fun being on tour if everything goes right, but not all of it is like that. The writing stage can be difficult, especially when you got a bandmate like Murdoc who can have a bad temper when things don’ go his way. When he gets real angry, he’ll throw things, usually at my head or smashes his bass or something overly dramatic because he’s an old prick like that.” In his mind’s eye, he could see Murdoc’s tantrums, Noodle’s exasperated expression at this, Russel looking bored at his drum set because he was tired of the same old routine of Murdoc’s dramatics. It brought a smile to his face.

               2D looked up, realizing he wasn’t in his recording studio, but sitting with two people he might benefit from impressing. Their shocked expressions said they were anything but. He cringed; he needed to save the conversation. “S-So I remember Adeline wanted to be a singer too. She had a lovely voice. I would have loved to take her on tour with me, maybe record some of her songs if—“ 2D wanted to punch himself in the throat. This was the first experience he’d had of “meeting the parents” and he was crashing at it. His intentions were pure, but he just was bad at thinking before speaking under pressure like this.

               “Yes, that was her dream. Our Addy had a lovely voice. She would have really liked touring.” Cecile’s expression had gone from excitedly interested to shocked to hurt to crestfallen in a span of a minute and 2D felt horrible. It was all going downhill fast. He wanted to say something to veer away from this dip in the conversation, but he had no idea what to say.

               “You know, sweet Amelie did so well in physical therapy today,” Sergio chimed in to save the day. He gave 2D a swift look as if to say, “I’ve got this,” as he put a comforting arm on his wife’s shoulder. “The doctors told us she’s making remarkable progress. At this rate, she might very well be able to dance again!”

               Cecile perked up in an instant. “Oh! That’s wonderful! Amelie will be so happy to hear that!”

               “Well, the doctors didn’t say that, but you know how determined our girl is. She loves dancing and not even bullets can keep her away,” Sergio laughed jovially, making Cecile brighten even more. 2D was absolutely relieved. He’d have to thank the man later for saving his skin.

               Shortly after, Amelie came to join them in the sitting room, having changed out of the workout clothes she was wearing into a pair of boyfriend jeans and a light sweater. She was without cane, and her hair was swept neatly to the side; she looked like she was ready for a breezy afternoon walk along the French cobbled streets with no troubles in mind, and 2D felt his stomach jump. He found that he’d want to do nothing else but that right now, hand in hand, enjoying her company in the temperate French weather.

               “Sorry that took so long. Shall we catch lunch?” She extended her hand to him and he eagerly took it. Her parents both gave a meaningful glance at their hold, and Amelie caught them looking at it, promptly slipping her fingers from his as he got up.

               The walk to 2D’s car wasn’t long, but he slowed down to make her comfortable as she limped along. She had cane in hand, but she wasn’t using it to assist her. He assumed it was her way of weening herself from the crutch. He rushed forward the open the door for her, to which he heard a quiet, “Such a gentleman!” from the house; Amelie’s parents were standing outside watching them. 2D’s cheeks flushed.

               Lunch with Amelie at the little bistro was pleasant. They sat on the patio and enjoyed the good weather, the easy conversation, and the good food. 2D found that, if not reminded of all of her recent tragedies, Amelie was her old self. She joked with him, laughed with him, and she smiled that lopsided, charming smile that he had grown extremely fond of. They ordered dessert and traded spoonfuls with the other, to taste. When the meal was done, they walked across the street to enjoy the park. 2D made her leave her cane in the car, so that they could walk arm-in-arm. When Amelie was tired, they sat on a bench to people watch, making up stories for strangers as they walked past.

               2D didn’t want the day to end; he wanted to stay on that bench with her, arm draped nonchalantly on the back behind her, watching her as she watched the world around them. He wanted to pull Amelie in close, and tell her his feelings, tell her how much he wanted to kiss her, and press his forehead to hers in that intimate kind of way. Time seemed to stand still when he was with her like this, so 2D was quite surprised when Amelie asked him if he wanted to go back to her house for dinner. He readily agreed.

               Cecile had served up roasted chicken and vegetables. It was arranged very prettily and the taste was something else. If 2D was being honest, it had been ages since he’d had a home cooked meal. His parents were always working, and when they were able to cook, 2D was away, working, on tour, or generally just not there. He had gotten used to instant foods, fast foods, restaurant cooking, or surviving on beer and cigarettes. Looking to his side, Amelie sat, laughing at her dad’s jokes, eating her mum’s food heartily, and casting playful glances at 2D. It felt… right.

               After the after-dinner coffee, 2D got up to leave. Amelie walked him to the door and gave him a tight hug. “Visit me before you leave for work, okay? I know you’ll be too busy when you get where you’re going.” She smiled that crooked half smile at him.

               “You know I will.” 2D grabbed Amelie’s free hand and squeezed it tight. He pulled open the front door and froze, looking out.

               “What’s wrong?” Amelie asked, peaking around.

               “I… well it’s night. I hadn’t realized it had gotten so late.” 2D checked his phone. It was nine in the evening; the street lamps had come on long ago.

               “Yeah… the sun was setting when we left the park…”

               “Oh,” he replied. “I… I should be okay to get home, I think.” He started to leave, but Amelie grabbed his arm.

               “What’s that mean?” she asked, perplexed.

               Rubbing the back of his neck, he explained. “It’s just that… well I have trouble seeing at night, with my eyes the way they are. I usually have to wear glasses, or just avoid driving at night. But in emergency cases, I should be okay! Just gotta drive slow, y’know.”

               Amelie pulled 2D all the way inside and closed the door. “I don’t think I would be very comfortable knowing you’re out there struggling to see behind the wheel. Can’t you stay the night?”

               2D’s face lit up with a bright blush. “Is… is that alright? I mean, I don’t want to impose, and your parents might think—“

               She laughed. “You’ll have a room of your own, and you aren’t imposing.” She put her hand in his. “Please, stay the night. You can leave in the morning as soon as you’re able, if you want.”

               The thought of spending the whole day with Amelie was thrilling, getting to stay the night at her house, even if they weren’t in the same room, made him dizzy. 2D rang his dad to tell him he’d have to stay the night there, while Amelie informed her parents and prepared the room.

               As he finished washing up for bed, 2D came out into the hallway to find Sergio standing there, waiting for him. There was no sign of Amelie, and it seemed as if the man wanted to keep whatever he was up to out of his daughter’s ears. He beckoned the singer to follow him further out of the hallway, away from the bedroom doors.

               “I hope you’re finding everything to your comfort,” Sergio started off quietly.

               2D nodded, gulping nervously. “Y-Yessir; I feel quite lucky to be put up for the night. Thank you for allowing me to stay.”

               “Thank you too,” Sergio said. At 2D’s confused expression, he expanded on. “I haven’t seen my Amelie so herself since before the draft. It’s clear that you bring something out of her, something we thought died with her sister.”

               The singer felt flustered at such a compliment. “A-And… what’s that, sir?”

               Sergio contemplated 2D for a moment, before placing a hand on his shoulder and giving it a solid squeeze. “Her happiness.”

* * *

 

               During the night, 2D couldn’t sleep, as usual. He tossed and turned in bed, the butterflies feeling completely unsettled in his stomach. Amelie was just a few feet away, separated only by a wall. If he wanted, he could tiptoe into her room to see her. They could stay up all night, talking and laughing, and maybe it would give him enough courage to tell her how he felt, and maybe she’d reciprocate with a kiss. 2D’s heart fluttered at such boyish thoughts, and he tossed in bed again.  

               It was too early to say what these feelings were, but 2D knew that no matter what, he wouldn’t want to move on without Amelie there with him. He cared about her a lot; perhaps too much for it to be _just_ an amicable feeling… Could this be…--?

               There was a tiny knocking on the wall by his head before his phone dinged.                             

                              From Amelie:

                              23:48

                              _“Must you fidget in bed all night?”_

23:48

                              _“Your restlessness is going to wake the whole house.”_

2D read the two texts thrice over before smiling.

                              To Amelie:

                              23:49

                              _“cant sleep”_

23:49

                              _“didnt wake you did i?”  
_

Through the thin wall by his head, he heard a muffled giggle.

                              From Amelie:

                              23:50

                              _“You did. I was just falling asleep, until I heard you tumbling round.”_

                              23:50

                              _“It’s your responsibility to put me back to sleep.”_

He couldn’t believe his eyes. He had to read that last text over and over again. That was definitely a flirty text, right? He had to plan his next message carefully, but there was only one thing he wanted to say. With shaky hands, he clumsily typed away, rewording the question until at least it felt a little okay. Gulping heavily, 2D stared at his text for a full minute before deciding, _fuck it_ , and pressed send. 

                              To Amelie:

                              23:52

                              _“k, can i come over to your room then?”_

               He wanted to add, “Promise to make sure you get a good night’s rest,” until he realized that could be perceived as very sexual. He heard Amelie’s text tone, but he didn’t hear her laugh or react. It was a while before she replied.

                              From Amelie:

                              23:56

                              _“You’ll just have to make do with the distance for now and try your best all the way from over there tonight.”_

               2D’s eyes were about to pop out of his head as he stared at the words, “for now”. Was she implying that _next time_ he’d be in close quarters? Was she implying that there _would be_ a next time for him to “come over to her room” then? He surely wouldn’t be able to sleep now, no way.

               They spent the night texting back and forth, listening to each other laughing quietly through the walls. At four in the morning was when they both finally succumbed to sleep, and when 2D woke a few hours later, he found that he was in the best of moods. Amelie walked him out, hair frizzy with sleep, eyes half opened.

               They made plans for the day after to go to a movie. He knew his time was coming, and so he told Amelie solidly that he wanted to spend as much time with her as possible, before he went back to Gorillaz. She pulled him down into a hug and made him promise to come say goodbye before then. And he did; they crossed pinkies, like they were in grade school. Before he pulled his car away, 2D looked out his window at the house. Amelie was still at the door. She held her little finger up, as a way to remind him about their childish promise, and in return, he stuck his own up in the air out of the car, so she could see it as he drove away.

               The trip home seemed to pass by in a flash; not even the dreary weather of the day could dampen his spirits. “I’m home!” 2D called, swinging open the front door of his parents’ house. There was the clinking of utensils coming from the kitchen, and the smell of breakfast foods wafted in the air.

               “We’re having brunch, come join us!” his mum called.

               Casually, with a smile still on his face, he strolled into the kitchen. His parents sat at the table in the breakfast nook, cups of tea in hand. They looked up at him jovially. It was rare to see his mother at home during the morning, so seeing her there put him in greater spirits.

               “Great timing son, we’ve just sat,” 2D’s dad said.

               Eyes on them, he moved forward to take his seat on the other side of the table, but another figure sat there. He was so focused on his family, that 2D didn’t catch the man who had joined their company until now. Frozen to the spot, the singer slowly looked round.

               There he sat, dressed his best black slacks and sweater, legs crossed like a proper gent, Murdoc Niccals had his clawed hands wrapped around a cup of tea, staring him down with those eyes that could make 2D sweat.

               “Morning, Dents,” Murdoc drawled.

               2D’s breath hitched in his throat. “Murdoc,” he greeted quietly. “What’re you doing here?”

               The bassist stood, brushing his slacks to straighten the crease. “It’s time we got to work on a new album, I think.” He advanced towards 2D slowly. “We waited for you to come back, but we can’t wait forever, you know.” By _we_ , 2D knew he meant just him. Noodle and Russel would have understood.

               “I was gonna come find you. I just wanted to spend more time at home, with my parents first.”

               “Darling, what about your band?” his mother chimed in. He knew she was incredibly supportive of his career, and that she loved his music, but right now was not the time to be encouraging of his passions and music!

               “Go get packed,” Murdoc said, “we should get going.”

               2D swallowed dryly. “Where’re we goin’?”

               The bassist grinned. “Home.”

               “But I _am_ home!” the singer exclaimed defiantly.

               “Son, if you don’t go now, you’ll never go. Music waits for no one!” his dad said, taking a bite of toast. “Anyway, your friend came all this way to get you. Best not waste his efforts.”

               Back in his bedroom, 2D cursed his supportive parents. He could have waved Murdoc off if they hadn’t been so in favour of this. As he closed his suitcase, he turned back to his vanity. The picture of him and the sisters still hung there, smiling back at him. He pulled the photo from the mirror and placed it gingerly into his wallet, which he tucked carefully into his back pocket. Before heading down, he grabbed his phone and pulled up his chat box with Amelie.

                              To Amelie:

                              11:48

_“Ames – dont think i can make that movie…”_

               He was about to hit send, when someone banged on his bedroom door, making him jump out of his skin. Murdoc was on the other side.

               “What the hell is taking you so long, Dents? Let’s _go_!” the Satanist grumbled impatiently. His smooth, gentlemanly demeanor was gone; seemed like it was just a show to be had for his parents.

               Looking down at his cell again, 2D held up a finger. “One sec; I just need to—“

               His phone was snatched away. “Do it later. I want to get out of here!” Murdoc stuffed it into his pants pocket and stalked away down the stairs, giving 2D one last glare, implying he should immediately follow.

               2D hugged his parents a final “see ya later”. His mum peppered his face with lots of kisses; he tried to pull away, but honestly, he’d miss this. His dad gave him a hearty pat on the back as they left, and the both of them waved the two off as they drove away in the Stylo (which he mentally kicked himself for not seeing just _sitting there parked right in the front_ ). The entire way to the new place, Murdoc was mumbling, half talking to 2D, about plans for the new album, but all the singer could think of was Amelie.


	11. Hoping for Gorillaz

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!
> 
> I'm so sorry it took me a long time to update. I got really busy with life and kind of got run over with things. I've been slowly working on this chapter over the past few months but just couldn't sit down and really concentrate on it until recently. Thanks for being patient with me though. I hope you guys have still stuck around and will enjoy what's to come next!
> 
> Best regards.

               Coming back to the Gorillaz was overall a shocking experience, mainly due to the half-wrecked Windmill Island tied to the roof like a hot air balloon. Inside, the house was in complete disarray, an environment completely different from what he was used to in the army and living with his parents all this time. When 2D walked through the door, Noodle jumped into his arms and Russel, finally back to normal size, scooped them both up in a bone crushing bear hug. They exchanged warm greetings and plenty of hugs; it was good to see them both. Murdoc disappeared shortly before that, and he didn’t see him until dinner that night. For the first time in years, all of them sat down to supper together, like a family. They spent many meals like that over the next few weeks; the four of them, swapping stories about what had happened to each of them since separating and catching up. While he didn’t want to talk about it, they’d even managed to get him to discuss what had happened to him since being drafted. None of them had to go to war; Murdoc was too old for the call to duty, and Noodle and Russel weren’t British citizens, so it didn’t apply to them.

               With everything happening since his return, 2D had completely forgotten about his movie date with Amelie until he found his phone on Murdoc’s broadcasting desk a week later while exploring more of the house. He had over twenty missed calls and texts from both of his parents, and from Amelie. Immediately, he ran to his room to call her back. She didn’t answer, so he sent her a text stating what had happened. Days passed before she replied back with a simple, “okay”. She was upset. He called her the second she sent the reply, but she didn’t answer, so he left a voicemail, asking her to answer his calls, or to call him back when she could. She never did.

               Another week passed by with his regular calls and texts finally broke her silent treatment. He was on the loo when she called; he didn’t want to answer while he was taking a dump, so he dismissed the call and sent a text, asking if he could call her back. She waited a few minutes before replying with a cold, “You’re busy. Don’t worry about it.” He tried to text back that it wasn’t what she thought, but in his panic, his phone slipped from his grip and fell between his legs with a splash into the toilet. It was week before he gave up trying to repair it and went to buy a new phone. By that time, she had gone MIA. As a late, anger inspired response to the act, 2D chewed out Murdoc for taking his phone in the first place, to which the older man shrugged it off with a middle finger.

               While Amelie never replied, 2D regularly sent her texts every day for the next six months. Without his knowing, his messages became less frequent, due to his ever busying schedule; they were trying to write and produce music again, traveling often per Murdoc’s request, and meeting with various artists for possible collaborations. Eventually, he became too busy to even look at his phone, but he would be reminded of Amelie every time he looked in his wallet. In the driver’s license window, he had stuffed the picture of her, Adeline, and himself, and every time he looked at it, his heart hurt. While he didn’t have the time to contact her, 2D thought about Amelie often; she’d usually find her way back into his mind while he was drifting into an uneasy sleep, or spending sleepless nights tossing and turning in bed.

               He talked to Noodle about it a few times, and she suggested that maybe his lingering feelings were either of need of closure, or of love. He definitely knew he needed closure; he didn’t feel right leaving things to be this huge misunderstanding. As for his reply to the accusation of love at first was that he’d been in love with Paula and it didn’t feel like this. The guitarist shrugged and said, “Maybe that wasn’t love, Toochie. It’s been over a year since you’ve seen this other woman and you’re still thinking about her. Did you ever have that with Paula?”

               No, he didn’t. After they kicked her out of the band, 2D had immediately stopped thinking about her. The conditions here were severely different, but he knew the answers he’d come to would be the same.

               Before he knew it, two years had passed in busy, slow music production. It was the middle of the night, and 2D, Noodle, and Russel had sleepily gathered in the living room where Murdoc was currently throwing his latest fit. Tonight was particularly nasty. He was throwing things and swearing at the top of his voice. He looked just beyond himself now.

               “My god, Mudz, what’s wrong THIS time?” Noodle called, looking to stop the noises before the neighbors called in to report a complaint with the police _again_.

               Apparently caught off guard, Murdoc paused mid-throw to stare avidly at the others, unaware that they were there. “I’ll tell you wha’s wrong! We haven’ written a damn good song in ages!” His words were slurring; drunk. “Plastic Beach isn’ makin’ the money it used to; do you—do you know how many years it’s been out?! We haven’ released an album since then!”

               2D practically choked on his yawn in his outrage. “Uhm, excuse me! What about The Fall? I released that album before I got drafted, and it’s been doing pretty damn well, if you ask me!”

               “WELL?! You’re un- _well_ if you think tha’s doing any good!” Murdoc retorted, barely getting any words out without hiccups.

               “UH, _WELL_ —I believe it’s pulling in good money, since you seem to be so damn worried about that! This house is getting paid mostly by The Fall! The food on your table, the liquor in your bloody gut! Last I checked, that’s from The Fall!”

               Murdoc threw another bottle across the room with a vicious yell, making everyone duck. It hit the opposite wall with a huge crash. “THE FALL IS GARBAGE.”

               Extremely tired, and already irritated from the past few months of frustration, 2D exploded. All the grievances that were building up inside of him, from trying to write this new album, dealing with Murdoc’s increasingly worsening fits, Amelie ghosting him, his unrequited feelings, over all this time finally broke him; that green goblin trashing his solely produced album, his baby, was the tipping point for him. Murdoc shouted, drunken and angry, and 2D shouted back, equally ferocious. It was a sight that neither Russel nor Noodle had ever seen in their time in the band. 2D had become so livid that his face was turning red. His eyes were welling up hot tears and he thought he might throw up from yelling so loudly and forcefully. Their argument got to such a point that Russel had to step in and separate them.

               “You’re a real piece of work, Mudz! A real pain the arse!” 2D yelled from behind Russel’s arm, voice choked with furious tears. “We’re all doing our best on this album and all you’re doing is pissing all over it!”

               “If you all were doing your best, then we’d have goddamn record by now, wouldn’t we?!” Murdoc rebuked. “What you’ve been giving me is mediocre play! What am I supposed to do with that?!”

               “Well that’s just rude,” Noodle replied, annoyed at the remark. “Sorry we’re not shitting out sick bangers on the daily.”

               Murdoc turned on her. “Don’t you fucking start; we’re two years into the production with no good results and you’re over here being a goddamn smart arse!”

               “Hey man, that’s not cool. 2D’s right, you’re being a real dick,” Russel cut in.

               “Oh—what, so you’re all ganging up on me? I’m just trying to make this album the best it can be!” Murdoc’s voice grew in outrage. His buzz was ruined and he was genuinely angry now.

               “No, man—“ the drummer began, but was quickly cut off by 2D’s jeering.

               “It’s because we all see that this album isn’t working going in your direction! Everyone sees it but you! You’re the one ruining this album!”

               Murdoc launched at the singer, but was quickly detained by the two others. “You little shit--!”

               It was a struggle to get him to stop trying to jump 2D, but eventually they were able to calm him down a bit.

               When he could catch a breath, Russel yelled at the singer, “Man, shut the fuck up! All you’re doing is antagonizing him! And you know, you haven’t been all that helpful either!”

               Outraged, 2D turned on his best friend in return. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?!”

               “You’ve been so goddamn obsessed with this girl who clearly isn’t into you, and feeling sorry for yourself, that you’ve shirked so many of your duties!” 2D glared at Noodle, who looked sheepish. Russel pulled his attention back, “Don’t you glare at her like that. She tells me everything because you won’t listen to what she says. I know you can be stupid, but fuck man, get it through your thick skull: the girl don’t want you! It’s been two years; leave her the fuck alone and move the fuck on!”

               2D was speechless. He knew he should forget about Amelie at this point, but he didn’t want to be told so. He fumbled for words, not sure what to say, but feeling hurt and betrayed all the same.

               “Russ is right, Toochie…” Noodle spoke up quietly. “We need you here, one hundred percent, for the album, and you’ve just… you’re just not into it when you’re so distracted with Amelie.”

               “Hear that, ‘D? Looks like it’s not just me ‘ruining the album’. You need to get your shit together and—“ Murdoc began, sneering.

               “Mudz, shut the fuck up! It’s mostly your fault this album isn’t getting done. You’re the leader of the band; lead us in a proper direction! You’re all over the place!  If you’re gonna demand the best out of us, then do _your_ best and decide where you want to go with this! Stop flip-flopping! You’re ruining our reputation with other artists by cancelling contracts with them last second because you thought of something else.” It was rare that Noodle talked to the bassist like this. They usually left each other well alone, but the woman would be lying if she said he wasn’t grating on her last nerve.

               Mouth twisted downward in white hot anger, Murdoc pushed Russel’s arm away before pointing a black nail at them all. “You don’t like what I’m doing? Then fine; fuck you all. Someone else can decide what to do with this album. Cancel it for all I give a damn! I’m done; let one of you shit heels take over and deal with all the stress.” He gave them all a last glare before stomping away out of the room.

               Russel sighed heavily through his nose. “Well that’s not good.”

               Noodle crossed her arms, clearly upset. “Probably for the best anyway. That old fart was in over his head, trying to rush songs like that.”

               Sighing heavily, the drummer ran his hand wearily down his face. “Well whatever... Let’s try to get some rest. I’m tired as hell.”

               The two marched tiredly up the stairs, 2D following a short while after, a troubled, thoughtful look on his face as he went to bed. He’d be having another sleepless night thanks to these charged feelings.

 

* * *

 

               When the sun rose, the singer was lying awake in bed with limbs thrown haphazardly in any which way, his eyes burning from remaining open for most of the night. The house was quiet, save for Russel’s loud snoring just down the hall. 2D slowly climbed out of bed, body stiff from a lack of sleep. He pulled on a pair of jeans and a decent smelling t-shirt that he had hung on the back of his desk chair before shambling down the stairs. In the kitchen, he made himself some coffee and took it back to his room, where he sat on the sill of his open window. The one good thing about this place was that the view was amazing in the morning. When he could manage it, or if he was already up, 2D would often just enjoy the silence of the surrounding area before the street woke up and began bustling with normal, everyday life. The light scent of pancakes wafted into his room from the gap beneath his door; someone in the house was awake.

               By the time he drained his cup of coffee, people were leaving their houses to go to work. 2D put the cup on his writing desk and then pulled a duffel bag from under his bed. He’d decided in the middle of the night, after turning in bed for the millionth time, that he was going to go home, to his parents. He just needed a break from Gorillaz. Diving head first into the band as soon as he came back, especially with all of his own personal turmoil going on, was probably not the best idea; he was quickly drained of enthusiasm for producing another album. He just wasn’t feeling it right then and needed to have some time to himself.

               He went back downstairs with his duffel bag slung over his shoulder. Noodle was in the kitchen with Russel; they were making a big breakfast together. The guitarists glanced at him and gave him a huge grin. 2D could tell the two were in a good mood in the way that they both chirped, “good morning,” to him.

               “Toochie, Russ and I came up with the best plan for the album in the middle of the night! Want to hear i—…Where are you going?” She had looked up at him, standing in the doorway finally and noticed his bag. Her change in tone prompted Russel to look up from the stove as well.

               “…What’s going on, ‘D?” the drummer asked, tone thoughtful.

               2D held his breath for a moment, before letting it all out in a huge sigh. “I’m going home.”

               Noodle came round the counter to face him. “… But you _are_ home.”

               “To my mum and dad’s, Noods; I need time away for myself. I need to clear my head.”

               Russel faced him fully now. “How long will you be gone?” he asked, voice even. 2D couldn’t tell if he was upset or not; it was always hard to tell when things were uncertain and serious.

               The singer shrugged his thin shoulders, not meeting their eyes. “Dunno; a few days, weeks. A month? I dunno. I just know I can’t concentrate on making music right now.”

               “Forget about the album right now… you don’t know when you’ll come back?” Noodle looked hurt. “What about us? What about Gorillaz? We need you here.”

               “Noods, didn’t you hear me? I can’t write music if I—I don’t feel good. I’m useless to the band right now, until I can sort out what’s going on with me.”

               Noodle was quiet for a long time, looking 2D in his dark eyes. She was disappointed. Russel came up behind her and put an arm around her shoulders with a firm squeeze. After a moment of staring at each other, he pulled 2D in for a hug, forcing Noodle to be a part of it. “Go,” the man said. “You need to sort yourself out. That’s what’s most important here. When you come back, we’ll be ready to welcome you.”

               The singer wrapped his thin arms around his best friend. He always understood him. Russel was probably the best person to talk to about anything; he was wiser beyond his years, and so understanding. 2D reminded himself to never forget, and would have to remember to show him his appreciation when he came back. “Take care of the band while I’m away.”

               The two walked him to the door. There was a taxi waiting outside (he had ordered it earlier). With final hugs and kisses, 2D turned away from them. He could practically feel their disappointment weighing on his shoulders. He didn’t want to leave, but he just needed to get away from the pressures of the music industry. At this point, he didn’t know what was wrong with him. He used to be able to endure years of long nights full of recording and writing, but that was when their songs were becoming instant masterpieces as soon as it left their brains; the tracks they were making these days just weren’t like that. Maybe his age was catching up to him, or all the drugs and drinking and careless fun. Maybe being in the military had somehow made him soft to the brutal attacks of making music. Whatever it was, he couldn’t sort himself out while constantly being pressured and hammered to make a banger.

               When he got to his parents’ houses, no one was home. He let himself in and settled down on the couch with a long sigh. After a few minutes, his phone dinged. Russel had messaged him. Murdoc found out that 2D left and was livid. He was gonna go after him, but they stopped him. Mudz threw a huge fit and went to go scream it out in his bedroom. Attached was a photo of one of the man’s basses abandoned in the yard, neck splintered in two, strings curled up like witch’s shoes with glass shattered all around it. Wasn’t too hard to deduce that Murdoc threw one of his instruments out of his closed bedroom window in a fit of rage.

 

* * *

 

               A week passed by like a minute. It hardly felt like any time had passed at all, but here 2D was, sprawled out in his old bed, limbs spilling over the edge since he was much too tall for it now. Occasionally, he’d get a text from Noodle or Russel asking him how he was doing. Even Murdoc tried to contact him once, but only to tell him that whenever he came back, he’d “better have something good to put on the album”; he didn’t respond to that one.

               2D decided he was feeling a bit peckish, and plodded downstairs to make himself a sandwich for lunch. On the way, he came across his mum, who was fetching a jacket out from the coat closet. “Hey mum, where you headed?” he asked casually.

               She froze, as if caught red-handed in a crime. “Son, I thought you were out!” she replied nervously.

               2D shrugged. “Nowhere to go. What about you, mum?” he asked again.

               “Oh, just… grocery shopping!”

               “I’ll come too. I’m bored at home.”

               She panicked as he began to move to get his coat. “Oh, well, I’ve also got a—a doctor’s appointment too!”

               Eyebrows scrunching together, he asked, “What kind of appointment?”

               She took a moment before answering, “…A gynecology appointment.”

               In normal circumstances, 2D would’ve backed out immediately, but something about the way she was acting was incredibly suspicious. “Mum, what’s going on? Is everything alright?”

               “I—Stu, honey…” She took one look at his panicked expression and broke. “Yes, dear, everything is okay. I—I’m not going to the doctor. I’m going to have lunch with…” She paused.

               “With who, Mum?”

               “…With Cecile.”

               “……Amelie’s mum…?”

               She nodded. 2D paused for a moment, unsure of how to feel about this before asking. “Do you… see Amelie too?”

               “I—sometimes, I suppose…”

               And suddenly, all those thoughts he’d put away, the feelings he had tried to smother out, came rushing back with a slamming feeling in his chest. With a stony face, the singer reached across his mother and grabbed a coat. “Let’s go,” he said.

 

* * *

 

               The drive to Amelie’s parents’ house was long and tense for 2D this time. He sat in the passenger seat, leg bouncing, eyes darting, fingers tapping impatiently. His insides were twisting with anxiety. In his mind’s eye, he could see the scene play out. They’d arrive at the house, Amelie would answer the door, looking her prettiest, the surprise lighting up her face. She’d recognize 2D in an instant and they’d share a breathtaking embrace. They’d spend the afternoon together, and in the evening she’d take him to backyard, where they would sit on the bench underneath the tree and watch the sunset paint the sky. When the stars would begin to shine, he’d bravely grab her hand and tell her how he missed her so. She’d respond by putting her head on his shoulder, reciprocate his feelings, and he’d shyly kiss her forehead.

               2D’s mum snapped him out of his fantasy with a nervous, “We’re here!” He looked out the driver side window to see that they were parked on the street, outside of a little bistro.

               “Where are we?” he asked.

               “Dover. Cecile wanted this little café here so we’ll be meeting her here.”

               The singer swallowed hard in disappointment. He was hoping to find Amelie still living with, or visiting, her parents while he was there. In France, in a place she called home, was his best chance of seeing her again; but they hadn’t even left England.

               As he shuffled into the building behind his mum, his phone vibrated with a call from Murdoc. He ignored it. He wasn’t in the mood to be heckled about his “vacation” while the others were hard at work. He didn’t want to talk Gorillaz business right now. He just wanted to stew.

               Cecile was already seated at a table; she was on the phone when she saw her lunch guests. They sat down on either side of her and she put her phone on speaker. “Ma cherie, say hello to the Pots!”

               Amelie’s voice rang clear from the listening piece. “ _Bonjour, Madam et Monsieur Pot_!” By “the Pots,” she probably thought 2D was his dad. “I hope you two are doing well!” She sounded upbeat, cheerful. “ _Mama_ , I’ve got to go, but I’ll see you tonight when I come into town, okay?”

               Cecile ended the call and began chattering about how good it was to see the singer again, but he wasn’t listening. The blood in his ears made it too hard to hear anything other than the millions of thoughts in his head. That was the first time he’d heard Amelie’s voice in ages, and it still had an effect on him after all this time.

               He decided then and there. 2D needed to see Amelie tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, yeah, Murdoc was kind of a dick in this chapter, but I promise, he's not always going to be like that in this story. He was just drunk and grumpy this time around.


End file.
